


Burdens of the Son

by PullTogether



Series: PullTogether's Zootopia Fanfic Collection [2]
Category: Zootopia (2016)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-21
Updated: 2016-06-11
Packaged: 2018-06-09 17:46:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 22,673
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6917122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PullTogether/pseuds/PullTogether
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When foxes start disappearing in Zootopia, Nick discovers that the sins of his father are a burden he can’t carry alone, as he struggles to protect Judy and her daughter from the worst threat he’s ever encountered: himself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Writer's Note: This is the second story in a series. If you haven't read it already, please read my other story,** _ **Never Time to Say Goodbye**_ **first!**

_I was excited and more than a little nervous to be headed back to work for the first time since the accident. I just skimmed through a few of the things I've written in this journal since then, and I can't believe how much has changed in my life. I've got a daughter now, and Nick and I are living together in the house he inherited from his mom. The changes in my life over the past year are still pretty overwhelming sometimes._

Judy stopped stuffing paperwork into a brown satchel as the morning news on the TV caught her attention.

" _Today the ZPD reported another missing fox, the third such case in the past three weeks._ "

"Here comes Superbunny," Nick said as he strode into the room, making whooshing noises as he playfully swooped Holly up and down through the air. The little bunny squealed and laughed as they continued around the room until she noticed her mom. Holly reached out her arms and spluttered, "ommmommmmom" as Nick brought her to Judy.

Judy smiled as she gave up trying to watch the tv and grabbed Holly. "Hey little bun." She scowled at Nick. "If you make her throw up on our uniforms right before we leave..."

"Aww Carrots, how else am I gonna teach her how to fly," he said as he picked up a white shoulder bag with a carrot on the side. "Besides, if she barfs on me, it'll give me an excuse to stay home and play with her all day."

"No way, slick Nick. Besides, Rita wouldn't forgive you for cutting into her time with Holly…" Judy trailed off as the pictures of three foxes appeared on the television. Two looked like portraits from a high school yearbook, while the third was a grainy still pulled from security camera footage.

The soothing voice of the newscaster filled the silence. " _The police have no leads at this time, and anyone with information on the whereabouts of the missing foxes is asked to contact the ZPD._ "

"Nick, I'm worried about these missing foxes. Tell me you'll be careful-"

Nick grinned and waved his paw dismissively as he interrupted her. "Don't worry Carrots, they're probably all hiding from their bookie or something. You know how foxes are," he said as he winked at her.

" _In other news, a group calling itself 'Kind With Kind' is staging a protest at City Hall in response to an ordinance prohibiting discrimination-_ " Nick picked up the remote and switched off the TV as Judy handed Holly back to him.

"Ok, Little Carrots, time to say bye bye to mom and go see Rita. I'll be back in ten minutes, if you need help carrying anything to the car." Nick hurried to the entryway and out the front door with Holly as she waved over Nick's shoulder at Judy.

_It still amazes me how good Nick is at evading serious conversations. But you can't fool me, my dear fox. I may not be able to tell what you're thinking, but I know when you're using those snarky remarks to hide whatever's bothering you._

Judy paused in the entryway as she glanced at a small wooden cane in the umbrella stand next to the open front door. Her ears drooped and she sighed just as Nick reappeared at the doorway.

"Rita said we'll need to bring more diapers tomorrow." Nick paused as he noticed Judy staring at the cane. Nick folded his arms as he spoke. "Come on, Officer Gimpy, just grab your cane so we can go. That mountain of paperwork on your desk isn't going to shuffle itself."

"I swear, if you call me that again I'll beat you even more senseless than you are already."

"Well, you better get used to it, especially if you injure yourself again because you're too stubborn to use your cane," he said, as he picked up the cane and held it out to her. "Trust me, I want you to stop lugging this thing around even more than you do. It's hazardous to my health, since you threaten me with it at least five times a day. You're just going to have to-"

Judy interrupted him and held up her paws defensively. "I know, I know… be patient." Judy reluctantly took the cane and smiled while she shook her head. "If you were anyone else, I'd have murdered you long ago," she said, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek as she squeezed past him.

"And if you were anyone else, I wouldn't care enough to give you so many reasons to kill me." He put on his sunglasses and followed her outside.

Judy waited for Nick to lock the door and caught him by the collar as he turned around. He waited with feigned impatience while she straightened out his tie and smoothed the front of his uniform. As her paws moved across his chest, she paused and squinted at two tiny carrots tucked next to his badge.

"What in the world is that on your uniform?" She reached out to touch them, but Nick batted her paw away as he walked to the car. He opened the door for her and spoke as she climbed in. "I never realized until recently how much I love carrots." He gave her a toothy grin as he closed the door before he made his way around the car and climbed into the driver's seat.

Judy chuckled and lectured him as they buckled their seatbelts. "I'm pretty sure that's a dress code violation, Officer Wilde. You better hope Chief Bogo doesn't see them."

Nick made a rude noise as he started the car. "Pfft, I've been wearing them for weeks now and old buffalo butt hasn't noticed. His eyesight is so bad, if it wasn't for my red fur he wouldn't even be able to tell the two of us apart."

_I'd forgotten about those two old oversized straight pins Nick showed me several weeks ago, with the little carrot heads. I thought he was fishing around, trying to see if I wanted them, so I jokingly teased him that they were kind of tacky looking. Then he told me that he'd found them in some of his mom's things. Of course I felt bad after that and said I was sorry, but he shrugged it off. I'm pretty sure he's wearing them now just to annoy me._

_I still feel self conscious using the cane, so I was especially nervous when I found a bunch of the officers had lined up to clap and cheer as I came in the front door of headquarters this morning. But even I had to laugh when Nick couldn't resist being Nick, as he waved to the gathered officers like he was Gazelle greeting adoring fans while he swaggered across the lobby. I thought Chief Bogo was going to blow a gasket when Nick thanked everyone for the unnecessary adulation._

Chief Bogo sat behind his desk and stared quietly down at Judy, who fidgeted as she waited in the hard orange chair for him to speak.

"It's good to have you back, Officer Hopps. I've already talked to Officer Wilde, and I want to make it clear that it is none of my business what sort of… relationship you two have outside of work. Officially, I'm completely in the dark, as long as you both avoid drawing attention to yourselves." He took off his glasses and jabbed them in her direction. "But if either of you get out of line, or make this a problem, the best case scenario is you'll both get reassigned to new partners. And you don't want to know what the worst case scenario is."

"Understood, sir."

Bogo glanced at the cane leaning on the chair next to her before he continued. "You'll be on desk duty until you fully recover. Earlier this week, the second precinct requested Officer Wilde's help examining the evidence they've gathered on the missing foxes, so hopefully that will keep him out of trouble until you're able to babysit him again. Dismissed."

_That sneaky fox. Now I know what's been bugging him, and why he hasn't been talking about work lately. I always feel guilty when I find out about things that he's been hiding from me, since I get a weird satisfaction from watching him squirm when I call him out on them later._

Judy sat in her chair and surveyed the huge jumble of mail and paperwork on her desk for a few moments before she sighed and reached for a letter on the top of the stack. She paused when she noticed another letter near the bottom of the pile marked URGENT in bold red letters and picked that one up instead.

As she tore the envelope open and started to read, she gasped and her eyes grew wide.

_I couldn't believe it. It was a court summons for a hearing to discuss emergency custody of Holly, and it started in three hours._


	2. Chapter 2

Judy whispered to Nick as they waited at the back of the courtroom.

“So, where’s this lawyer you found?”

Nick smiled. “Relax Carrots, he’ll be here. He’s a weasel named Jimmy Donnola. He came highly recommended by Mr. Big himself.”

“Oh sweet cheese and crackers.”

Nick followed Judy’s gaze to see a skunk and a rabbit standing in the doorway of the courtroom.

He chuckled. “Well well well, that must be Irvin. I had no idea red fur was a thing for you--” Nick’s mouth snapped shut as he noticed the look Judy gave him, a glare filled with murderous intent.

 

_ Yep, it’s true, Irvin has red fur. I’ve avoided telling Nick because I knew he’d have a field day with that little gem. At least I didn’t have to pummel him with my cane to get him to stop teasing me. _

_ I don’t know how I feel about having a lawyer known as Jimmy the Weasel representing me, but I have to admit he knows his way around the courtroom. Only Nick would know how to find a good lawyer so quickly.  _

_ I really wish I’d updated my home address at work, and apparently Nick forgot to forward my mail. Still, they obviously didn’t try very hard to get me the summons in a timely manner, as Jimmy astutely pointed out. That weasel tore Irvin and his skunk lawyer to shreds. He not only successfully got the hearing moved to a later date, but he made sure we’d proceed with a much friendlier judge.  _

_ It turns out Irvin’s lawyer and the judge know each other through some group called “Kind With Kind”. I don’t know much about them, except that they seem to have a real problem with interspecies relationships.  _

 

Nick paced back and forth in the conference room as he spoke. “Why is Irvin interested in Holly all of a sudden?”

Jimmy shrugged. “I don’t like to speculate on his motives, but I can say that the KWK lawyers are known for taking cases like this just to stir up controversy.”

Judy gave him a puzzled look. “What do you mean?”

As Jimmy paused to consider his response, Nick blurted out, “What he means is, I’m a fox living with a poor little bunny and her bunny daughter. As an added bonus, we’re ZPD officers, and well known ones at that. The press will have a field day with this.”

Jimmy nodded as Nick stopped pacing and sat next to Judy.

Judy held Nick’s paw as she spoke to the lawyer. “So how do we make this go away?”

Jimmy shrugged. “It depends on what Irvin really wants. I think we all know he doesn’t want full custody, which he has no reasonable shot at anyway, but he could push for split custody of some sort.”

Judy shook her head when she heard the last part. “There is no way in hell I’m sharing custody with him.”

Nick looked thoughtful for a moment. “Is it possible he’s doing this to avoid paying support? I mean Judy didn’t go after him, but she could. Maybe Irvin sees this as a way to weas--” Nick paused, looking embarrassed. “Sorry, that was an awful thing I was about to say.”

Jimmy smiled, showing all his teeth. “I’ve heard worse. But what you’re saying is possible.”

Judy’s nose twitched for a moment. “Couldn’t he just sign away his parental rights, in exchange for staying out of Holly’s life?”

Jimmy shook his head. “Unfortunately, he can’t, unless…” Jimmy looked at Nick as he continued. “Unless someone agreed to adopt her. Irvin would have to agree, and he’d be off the hook for future support. However you should realize that something like this is exactly what the KWK wants.”

Nick smiled at Judy while he spoke.  “In a way, Irvin may have done us a favor, Carrots, because I was going to try to track him down eventually anyway. This isn’t exactly the way I’d hoped we could talk about this, but…”

As Nick trailed off, Judy turned to ask the lawyer, “Wait, is that even possible?” 

Jimmy nodded. “There is no law specifically prohibiting it, and there is precedent for interspecies adoption, but as a predator/prey adoption, this one would be the first that I’m aware of.”

Nick said hesitantly, “We can talk about this more before you make a decision, Judy.”

Judy shook her head as she smiled up at him. “Holly would be lucky to have a dad like you, Nick.”

She turned back to Jimmy. “Let’s start the process right now. See if Irving will go for it. I want him out of our lives as soon as possible.”

 

_ We were both pretty quiet on the drive back home. We’d long ago agreed to avoid having important discussions in the car, which was tough for me because I wasn’t the kind of bunny to sit on something we needed to talk about, while he was the kind of fox who usually liked to carefully contemplate things first before he discussed them. He’d joked once that I would trap him in the car so he couldn’t escape a conversation, like he sometimes did when he’d go hide in the backyard shed for awhile after we had particularly heated arguments. It’s frustrating for me sometimes, but since he always comes back eventually to finish our discussions, I’ve learned that it’s best to give him space until he’s ready to talk. _

 

Nick grabbed a package of diapers from the backseat of the car and ducked under the garage door as it started to close. He put on his sunglasses before he wrapped his free arm around Judy’s shoulder. Judy smiled up at him as he spoke. “Are you sure you’re ok with me being Holly’s dad?”

“Yes, if you’re sure you want it, too.”

“More than anything.” Nick stopped walking, causing Judy to pause next to him. “Well almost anything.” He held her paw as he awkwardly continued. “You know, I’d… I’d offer to make an honest bunny out of you, if I could.”

“I know, and I’d say yes if we could get married.” She smiled up at him mischievously as they held hands and continued walking. “Things are changing, though. We’ll just have to be patient.”

Nick laughed. “It’s a good thing you’re here to teach me how to be patient.”

“You’re already so wonderful with Holly. I’m just happy we can make it official. You’ll make a great dad, Nick.”

Nick paused thoughtfully for a few moments before he continued. “Well, I have my dad to thank for that. All I have to do is ask myself, ‘what would my dad do?’ And then if I do the exact opposite, I know I’m doing the right thing.”

Judy’s ears drooped as she looked up at him. “Oh, Nick…”

Nick shrugged. “It’s ok. It makes me appreciate Little Carrots even more, if that makes any sense. Now shhhh, I want to see if I can open the door without our little bunny hearing us,” Nick said as he handed the diapers to Judy and snuck across Rita’s front yard. He stealthily made his way to the fox-sized door next to the much larger front door as he fished his keys from his pocket.

 

_ Our little bunny. That was something new, the idea of Holly being ours, and it was a wonderful thrill to hear him say it. Of course she heard us coming and almost knocked him over when he opened the door. She’s been moving faster and jumping higher every day, but I couldn’t believe it when she actually jumped up into his arms. Even Nick was surprised, he said she’d never done that before. _

_ Rita is wonderful. She’s a retired teacher, and she used to watch Nick while his mom worked. I don’t know what we’d do without her. _

_ Even though she’s small for an elephant, she still towers over us. It’s weird to think of a mammal that big taking care of our little bunny, but Holly adores her. She’s fascinated by Rita’s trunk, and it’s amazing how gentle and delicate it is.  _

_ Nick and I had a long talk before he went out to the backyard shed for awhile. He calls it his “thinking cave”. I made him promise that he wouldn’t tease me about Irvin, and we talked about all the things that had happened that day as well as a bit about the missing foxes. He said he hadn’t talked about the cases before because he didn’t want to worry me, and how he’s just examining the evidence so he isn’t at risk anyway. He also promised to tell me more about his dad sometime, though I’m not holding my breath while I wait for him to open up about that. _

 

“Aren’t you done writing in your diary yet?”

“Nope, I use my  **journal** to keep track of all the times you annoy me, and today there’s more to write than usual.”

Nick laughed. “Now I know you’re joking, because you would’ve filled it ten times over by now if that’s what you really wrote in there.”

He sat next to her on the bed and looked at his paws. “ I am really sorry that I teased you about Irvin, and that I forgot to forward your mail here.”

Judy smiled. “It’s ok, I know teasing is your thing. Normally it doesn’t bother me, but I really can’t go there with Irvin, at least not right now. And I should have double checked the mail forward when I got out of the hospital, plus I forgot to update my home address at work too. We both had way too much on our minds back then. I do want to tell you again, thanks for finding the lawyer for us.”

“You’re welcome, Judy.”

Judy snuggled against Nick as he wrapped an arm around her. He sighed before he spoke. “There’s something else I need to tell you, and you aren’t going to like it.” He gripped her tighter as she looked up at him. “I got a call from the second precinct while I was out in the shed. They found the body of one of the missing foxes a few hours ago.”


	3. Chapter 3

 

_ I decided to skip the morning news today, since I was nervous enough without being bombarded with pictures of the dead fox. Nick managed to do a good job calming me down on the way to work, but all the warm fuzzy feelings from the car ride evaporated when we came in the door and Clawhauser solemnly told us that Chief Bogo wanted us in his office immediately. _

 

A large vein pulsed on Chief Bogo’s neck as he shouted at Nick and Judy.  “This is how you avoid drawing attention to yourselves?” Bogo stood up to tower over them as he slammed a newspaper down on his desk. The headline screamed ZPD FOX OFFICER TO ADOPT BUNNY.

He glowered down at them as he continued. “As you have no doubt already heard, one of the missing foxes turned up dead yesterday. I’ve gotten a request from the second precinct to temporarily assign Officer Wilde to help with the fox cases. Tomorrow you’ll be Chief Hart’s problem, Wilde.”

“Finally, someone who appreciates--”

“Shut it, Wilde. Today, you’re both on desk duty. Hopefully filling out paperwork will keep you both from becoming an even worse PR nightmare for the ZPD than you already are. Dismissed.”

 

_ I get why Bogo didn’t send us out today. Protests by the KWK had picked up around the city, and Nick and I were the poster children for what had stirred up that particular hornet’s nest. _

_ It was nice having Nick by my side today, even with all his whining about the paperwork. He always makes the most boring work go by quicker. _

_ Speaking of Nick and work, I’ve got to remember to call him Officer Wilde. I slipped up and called him Nick in front of Francine, who just laughed and winked at me, but I don’t want to look so unprofessional, especially in front of some of the less tolerant mammals. _

_ Though to be fair, no one so far has indicated to me that they have a problem with my relationship with Nick. I have, however, seen some of the predators giving Nick odd looks and whispering behind his back. I know he notices, since he’s put up with that kind of thing his entire life. _

_ Nick disappeared in the afternoon to fill out some paperwork related to his upcoming work at precinct two, and I ended up driving the car home. I haven’t driven much since the accident, but I made it home without any trouble. _

 

Judy glared at Nick as he came through the bedroom door, her paws on her hips as her foot stamped on the ground impatiently.

Nick rolled his eyes. “Whatever it is, I didn’t do it, Carrots.”

“I was getting worried about you. I thought you’d be home sooner.”

“Sorry, you’re right, I should have called, but I lost track of the time.” He gave her a sly look as he came over to kiss her on the head while he removed his tie. “The guys down at precinct two love me and can’t get enough of foxy Nick.”

Judy followed him as he walked into the closet to change out of his uniform. Still looking annoyed, she said, “I called, but you didn’t answer.”

“Yeah, I was in their basement break room. I don’t think my phone gets good reception down there.”

Judy sighed and her expression relaxed as she sat down on the bed. “Don’t worry about it. Honestly, I’m glad you got some time to hang out somewhere besides the house, since you’ve been stuck here pretty much every night since I got out of the hospital. But remember, I’m one anxious bunny these days, ok?”

Nick came out of the closet, wearing shorts and a blue ZPD tshirt. “I really am sorry, Carrots. I’ll be better about letting you know when I’m running late. I’m still not used to having someone worry about me all the time.” He smiled as he sat next to her on the bed and hugged her.

She hugged him back. “You better believe it, foxy Nick.”

He pulled away slightly as he looked into her eyes and grinned mischievously. “I’ll try to behave and not make you worry about me too much.”

Judy gave him a dubious look. “Speaking of behaving, how about you try not to torture the second precinct Chief too much?”

“Are you kidding? I’m sure Bogo already warned him about me, so I’m gonna be as sweet as an angel, to make sure Chief Hart has nothing but nice things to say about me when I come back to precinct one. It’ll drive Bogo nuts.”

Judy shook her head and grinned as she replied, “You really can’t resist playing with fire, can you? If you put half as much energy into doing your job as you did tormenting--”

A loud crash and the sound of shattering glass interrupted her. Squealing car tires could be heard in the street as Judy raced out the bedroom door, with Nick right behind her.

 

_ The noise woke up Holly, so I grabbed her while that idiot Nick ran out into the front yard, but whoever tossed the brick through our front window was long gone. Nick promised he’d get some cameras installed this weekend, and he knows a beaver who can fix the window. We should probably put up some motion lights too. _

 

Nick called out to the officers as they walked across the dark driveway to their cruiser, “Make sure you don’t lose that brick. I always keep thoughtful gifts from my adoring fans.” The rhino and wolf laughed as they got in the car and drove away.

Nick covered the broken window with a board. Judy held it in place while he hammered in two nails to keep it from moving.

“I think I can handle the rest from here, Carrots. Why don’t you go back inside?”

Judy nodded. “I’ll go check on Holly.”

 

_ Holly was still awake, so I ended up bringing her to bed with us. Nick usually isn’t a big fan of sleeping in bed with “two extra kicky bunnies” as he puts it, but I think we ended up sleeping better than usual after everyone finally got comfortable, as Holly and I snuggled on Nick’s chest and went right to sleep. _

 

Nick quietly drummed his paw on the steering wheel to the beat of the Fleetwood Mammal song playing on the radio as Judy spoke. “I can’t believe you’re wearing that ratty old shirt on your first official day visiting the second precinct.”

Nick gestured with one paw at the green hawaiian shirt he was wearing and smirked as he replied, “What? This shirt is a classic. And relax, Carrots, I’ll change into my uniform when I get there. I just need to run a few errands first.”

Judy’s nose twitched as she opened a letter and began to read. “Mom and dad say hi. Aww, mom wrote that Great Uncle Stan passed away.”

Nick nodded somberly. “I’m sorry for your loss.”

Judy shrugged. “It’s ok, I didn’t know him that well. In a family as big as mine, we get these kinds of letters pretty regularly, almost as often as we get birth announcements.”

Nick chuckled as Judy read the letter aloud. “Great Uncle Stan died peacefully in his home, surrounded by his family. How come they always say that?”

“Well, how else is an old rabbit living in Bunnyburrow supposed to go?”

Judy shrugged. “I dunno, I guess just once I’d like to read something a little more... exciting.”

Nick thought for a moment before he said, “How about ‘The old bunny died in an explosion while doing what he loved most, making illegal carrot moonshine’.”

Judy giggled and rolled her eyes. “Oh brother, talk about a bad stereotype. Also, you make moonshine out of corn, not carrots.”

Nick barked out a quick laugh. “Hah, you should tell me more about your illicit moonshine recipes sometime.”

Judy smiled as she spoke. “I think something like, ‘millions mourned her passing, thankful for the difference she’d made in their lives’ sounds pretty awesome.”

“You’re halfway to a million already, with the size of your family…OWW,” Nick wailed as Judy punched him in the arm.

He rubbed the sore spot on his shoulder and scowled at her. “No hitting the driver. You bunnies are mean, and way too morbid. I don’t even want to think about...”

Nick trailed off as he gripped the steering wheel with both paws and looked straight ahead.

Judy put a paw on his arm. “What’s wrong?”

Nick gave her a sidelong glance. “I think… I think the way I want to be remembered is the most selfish thing I’ve ever wanted.”

“Tell me...what is it?”

Nick shook his head and avoided looking at Judy as he drove the car into the ZPD parking lot.

She crossed her arms. “Fine, I’ll just guess then. Selfish… oh, you’re always stealing the last slice of pizza, like you did the other night at dinner, so... I can see it now, ‘Nick choked to death on the last piece of pizza, the one that he’d solemnly promised to leave for Judy’.“

Nick laughed and shook his head. “Nope, way worse than that.” He let the car roll to a stop next to the curb before he looked at Judy. He reached out and held her paws in his as he said, “I want mine to say that I died an old fox, with you holding my paw and telling me that you love me.”

 

_ Good grief, Nick is such a goofball all the time, but every now and then he says stuff that just throws me for a loop. I got all weepy, and reminded him again to please stay safe. He just laughed and made some snarky comment about emotional bunnies. He said he’d pick me up after work before he kissed me goodbye. _

_ I missed Nick all day, especially with all the extra boring paperwork Chief Bogo had me working on. I did sneak outside for a walk at lunchtime, to stretch my legs. As long as I don’t overdo it, I hardly ever need my cane anymore, though I’m still being extra careful so I don’t hurt myself. _

 

Judy spoke into her phone as she stared across the ZPD parking lot. “Hey Nick, I haven’t heard from you, and it’s almost six. Can you give me a call when you get this?”

She ended the call and stared at her phone for a few moments before she noticed Clawhauser huffing and panting as he raced towards her from the lobby.

“Hey Benji, how’s my favorite cheetah?” she asked when he finally got closer.

He stopped and tried to give her a note as he managed to squeeze the words out between wheezing breaths. “Whew, hey Judy, glad I caught you before you left.”

_ A meter maid from precinct two called looking for Nick. She said that his car had been ticketed, and she called it in when she noticed the ZPD parking sticker in the window when she came back to find it hadn’t moved four hours later.  _

_ When she told me no one at the precinct had seen Nick all day, I freaked out and told her that he might be missing, and she promised to call her dispatch and try to find him. I was probably overreacting, but it wasn’t like him to just disappear, especially after the talk we had last night. She said she would go ahead and have the car towed to the precinct and get the forensics guys to go over it, and that I should bring the keys and meet Nick’s partner at the second precinct headquarters. _

_ Nick’s partner. It’s weird, thinking about someone besides me being his partner. I had a long time to think about that, as I rode the train down to precinct two alone. _


	4. Chapter 4

“Hi, my name is Angelina Vydra, but you should just call me Angie. I’m a big fan, Officer Hopps. You inspired me to join the ZPD.”

   Judy smiled at the eager young otter and shook her paw. “I’m glad to meet you, Angie. And please, call me Judy.” Judy pulled a key from her pocket. “And before I forget, here’s the key to the car.”

   Angie nodded as she took the key. “Thanks. They already got inside, but this will make it easier to move later. The forensics team should be done looking it over later tonight. Does Officer Wilde have any family who can pick it up?”

   Judy’s ears drooped as she looked at the ground. “Uhhh, nope, Nick’s… I mean, Officer Wilde’s mom passed away, and I have no idea if his dad is even still alive. I’m… well, I mean, Nick and I, err, Office Wilde and I…” Judy trailed off as Angie patted her shoulder.

   “It’s ok, I know you guys are an item. Even without the story in the paper, I could figure it out just from the way he talks about you. He really is something else. He had everyone in stitches yesterday in the breakroom.”

   Judy smiled, and her ears perked up. “Yeah, he’s definitely one of a kind.”

   Angie looked uncomfortable for a moment before she spoke. “I don’t want to worry you even more than you are already, but the body of another one of the missing foxes turned up a few hours ago.”

 

_ So now two of the missing fox cases are homicide cases. I keep hoping Nick going missing is a coincidence, but I’m going crazy with worry right now. _

_    On top of everything else, I won’t be able to get the car out of impound. Unfortunately, since I’m not family and my name isn’t on the title, they can’t turn the car or its contents over to me. Well, except for Nick’s uniform and police gear, which Angie said she could drop off at precinct one tomorrow. I’m thankful we left Holly’s car seat at home yesterday, though it doesn’t do me much good without a car. _

_    Both precincts one and two sent out an ATL (attempt to locate) alert for Nick, but no one has seen him. The car was found down near the wharf, but there was almost nothing in the area to explain why the car was parked there. I hope someone comes forward with information when they show his face on the news later. _

_ I took the train home and decided that I better see if Nick left anything in the shed that might help me find him. I didn’t really want to drag Holly out there, so I went home first before I picked her up from Rita’s. _

 

“Geez Nick, what a mess.” Judy looked around the shed, which was crammed with boxes. Several of them were open, their contents scattered across the floor.

Judy noticed an open photo album on a small desk in the corner. She picked up the album and paged through it, but aside from one old photo on the second page, it was empty. Judy pulled the photo from the album and flipped it over to read  _ John and Eddie _ handwritten on the back.

In the photo were two male foxes standing in front of a nondescript bar counter. One was wearing a dark t-shirt with the letters LROB in white on it while the other was wearing a bright blue hawaiian shirt. They each had one arm over the other’s shoulder as they hammed it up for the camera. On the counter behind them was a hat with a red W inside a white circle. 

 

_ It looked like a few other photos had been taken from the album, but it was hard to tell. I wonder if one of the foxes is Nick’s dad, John? And Eddie, could that be referring to the first missing fox, Edward Escurro? Based on that old Little River Otter Band t-shirt one of the foxes is wearing, they could be about the same age as the missing fox. I’ll show the picture to Angie tomorrow and see if it matches anything in the case file. _

_ When I picked up Holly, I talked to Rita about Nick going missing, and showed her the picture from the shed. She didn’t recognize either of the foxes. She’d never met John, but she’d heard he sometimes wore hawaiian shirts. Like father, like son? _

_ Rita told me I could stay in her guest room if I wanted to, and that she would watch Holly as much as I needed in the days ahead. When he was younger, Nick stayed with her sometimes, so at least all the furniture in her guest room is the right size. But for now, I just want to go home. I guess part of me is still hoping Nick will show up tonight, annoyed that he had to take a taxi home because the car was towed. _

_ Angie called and said the forensics team didn’t find anything out of the ordinary in the car, though they did find Nick’s cell phone in the glovebox with a dead battery. At least now I know why he wasn’t picking up. They looked at the contents of the phone, but there was nothing unusual on it, either. The only calls he made in the past two weeks were to me or to work. She ended the call by offering me a ride to work tomorrow after she found out I was taking the train. _

_ I stayed up late to watch the news, to avoid thinking about how this would be the first night that Nick wouldn’t be by my side since I’d left the hospital. I cried when they ran a story about Nick’s disappearance and showed his picture. The next story was about the homicides, and I had to turn off the TV when the story after that was about several KWK protests. _

_ I’m so worried about you, Nick. _

 

   “Thanks for giving me a ride this morning, Angie. I really appreciate it.”

   Judy whistled as she sat in the passenger’s seat. “Wow, they must pay you guys well in the second precinct, if a rookie can afford a personal car like this.”

   Angie smiled. “My dad bought it for me after I made it through the academy. I think he felt bad that he hadn’t been more encouraging when I told him I wanted to be an officer.”

   Angie pulled into the street and headed for the freeway as she spoke.

   “Can I ask you a question, Judy?”

   “Of course.”

   “Why does Officer Wilde’s uniform have two tiny carrots on it?”

   Judy laughed. “It’s an inside joke… it shouldn’t be too hard to figure out. Plus I think he’s trying to see if the Chief will notice. As if Nick doesn’t already get yelled at all--”

 

_ It was right then that a message came across Angie’s police scanner. I started to tell her how jealous I was, since Nick had absolutely forbidden one in our personal car, when I heard what the message was. I’d never heard that many codes streamed together in a single message before. I was able to pick out a request from the second precinct for Chief Bogo to get in touch with them, and apparently there was a homicide investigation in progress down near the wharf. _

_ Immediately after the radio chatter ended, Angie got a call on her cell phone. A third fox had been found on Harbour Street. I thought I was going to go insane as we inched our way through the morning rush hour traffic. _

 

Judy bolted out of the car before it stopped rolling and raced by several surprised officers before ducking under the yellow police tape.

She arrived at the scene, just in time to catch a glimpse of red fur and a green hawaiian shirt as an officer zipped up the body bag.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel so bad about this cliffhanger... but never fear, I promise I'll post the next chapter as soon as possible.


	5. Chapter 5

_It wasn’t my most professional moment. Chief Bogo arrived to find that I’d handcuffed myself to the gurney while I argued with the hippo who wanted to seal the bag and load it into the van._

Chief Bogo cleared his throat before he spoke. “Officer Hopps, just let everyone do their job. I promise, given the circumstances, this is priority one for the coroner’s office--”

“Regulations state that an investigating officer--”

“But you aren’t the investigating officer, not in this case.”

“I will be, if that’s…” Judy trailed off, her ears drooping as she looked at the body bag. “I need to see him, Chief.”

Bogo stared at her silently for several seconds before he spoke. “You really want to do this right now? Ok, fine. But… you don’t touch anything. Do you understand?”

Judy nodded as she unlocked the handcuffs.

_The first look was the hardest, with all the blood matted in the fur on his face. I flinched and looked away initially, but I had to look again. I had to be sure._

_And then I just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry with relief. At least I managed to keep it together as I talked to Chief Bogo._

“It isn’t Nick.”    

Chief Bogo looked at Judy. “Hopps--”

“It’s not him. Look…” Judy pointed at the fox’s face. “This fox has way too much gray around his muzzle. And his red fur is darker than Nick’s. Yes, he’s wearing Nick’s shirt, I’d recognize it anywhere, but I’m telling you, this isn’t Nick.”

_Thank god Bogo didn’t push it, or I would have had to add that this fox also wasn’t missing a little clump of fur at the base of his neck, where I’d nipped Nick a little too hard the other night. That definitely would have been an incredibly awkward conversation._

Bogo stomped away from the van as they loaded the body, and Judy hurried to catch up with him. She hopped in front of Bogo, forcing him to stop as she spoke.

“You have to put me on this case, or I’ll be even more obnoxious than Nick ever was.”

Chief Bogo let out an amused snort. “Oh, so now you’ve moved on from criminal trespassing to blackmail, eh? I’m finally starting to realize just how much of a terrible influence Officer Wilde has been on you.”

Bogo sighed as he continued. “Don’t worry, Hopps. I should fire you, but instead, I’m putting you on the case. I couldn’t keep you off of it anyway, and with both precincts stretched thin while we deal with the protests, you’re the most logical investigative officer from precinct one for several reasons. But, if you ever pull a stunt like that again… I warned you about this before. You can’t let your personal life interfere with your job.”

_Chief Bogo told me to coordinate with Angie at the second precinct, and as an added bonus, he agreed to let me use the cruiser after hours. He probably wouldn’t be happy if I left Holly’s car seat in the back, though, so I’ll stick to only using it for ZPD business._

_I did finally lose it, while I was waiting for Angie in her car. I couldn’t help it, when I saw Nick’s uniform in the back seat. I sat next to it and bawled my eyes out for a few minutes. After that, I pilfered the carrot straight pins off of his uniform and carefully slid them in behind my badge._

_If you want them back, Nick, you’re going to have to come get them._

Judy and Angie sat at a table as they went over the case file that Nick had left in the car.

“I found a list that I haven’t seen before. Here, can you read Officer Wilde’s handwriting?”

Judy rolled her eyes as she read the list. “His handwriting really is terrible. And of course, he’s mixed in personal items on here, even though I’ve told him a million times not to do that. Let’s see if we can figure out which of these todo items is actually relevant to the case.”

_We updated our copies of the case file with the picture I found in the shed, plus the list in the file Nick had. We also spent time adding in all the new information that had come in since yesterday. We’re still trying to figure out the list Nick made:_

  * _talk to wanda in am_


  * _pick up more diapers, copy pics_


  * _remind chief hart where to get decent donuts/coffee_


  * _reinterview families, show pics, find eddie’s family/associates. dad’s shady business partner?_


  * _call mrs hopps, judy’s fav flowers?_


  * _make appt with B_



_Even Nick’s lists are annoying._

“So no mention of a Wanda anywhere?”

Angie shook her head. “Nope.”

Judy sighed. “I’m so glad Nick included diapers, donuts, coffee, and a call to my mom on this list. That’s gonna look great when we file it later.”

Angie laughed. “I’m sure records has seen worse.”

Judy studied the list intently. “I have no idea who ‘B’ could be. Bogo? Though for all I know, it stands for barber, or is the name of his dentist.”

Angie smirked before she spoke. “So, the way I see it, we’ve got a few action items from the list. We didn’t find any receipts, so I don’t know if he got to the second item or not, assuming he was going down the list in order. Also, there aren’t any traffic cams down where he parked, so we don’t know where he went after he got out of the car. But it looks like he did have some new pictures, and he wanted to show them to the families of the other two foxes. Wanna flip for who gets to show the families the picture you found, and who gets to visit every convenience store in the area and see if a fox came in to buy bunny sized diapers and copy some pictures?”

_I told Angie I’d take the stores, and she could take the fox families. She was surprised, until I reminded her the foxes would probably prefer talking to a small predator instead of a rabbit. Honestly, though, I really just wanted to think and stretch my legs._

_Before we left the station, Angie and I examined the preliminary report from the coroner, which confirmed that the fox found wearing Nick’s clothes was Eddie. The toxicology report said that several unusual things were in his bloodstream, including low levels of night howler. He had blood from at least three different mammals on his fur and clothing, one of which matched his blood type and one that matched Nick’s. The other blood on his face and clothes wasn’t his or Nick’s. In fact, it didn’t look like it was fox blood at all. They’re doing further tests, including checking DNA, but it will take awhile for the results to come back._

_Angie and I still can’t figure out why Eddie was wearing Nick’s clothes. Maybe it’s a message? A warning? From who? We’ve gone around in circles, but we still have no idea, though a clue in one of his pockets has given me something to think about._

_Eddie’s pockets were empty, except for a small metal disk about the size of a quarter. It was stuck inside one of the pockets with a wad of gum. Forensics finally got us some pictures of it so Angie and I could see it for ourselves._

Judy looked quizzically at the first picture of the metal disk. _BORIS_ was scratched into the silvery surface, as if whoever did it was in a hurry. She flipped to the next picture of the disk and gasped.

“What is it, Judy?”

Judy showed the picture to Angie. Carefully engraved on the other side of the disk was a heart with _N+C+LC_ inside of it. “I think Nick’s trying to tell me something. Is there any mention of someone named Boris in the file?”

  _I had to explain to Angie that Nick called me Carrots and our daughter Little Carrots, so it seems pretty clear that he’s the one who scratched the message on the disk. It’s amazing how the clues he left behind make me want to both laugh and cry at the same time._

_After going through the file and checking several old case databases, Angie and I still don’t have any idea who Wanda or Boris are. Could Boris be who Nick wanted to make an appointment with? I’ve never heard him mention anyone named Boris before, so I don’t know._

_No luck checking the stores either. On the upside, my leg actually felt great after all the walking. Nick would chide me for not bringing the cane, but the doctor told me I only needed it if my leg ached, and it felt better than it had since before the accident._

_I decided to take Rita up on the offer to stay in her guest room. I didn’t feel like going home to an empty house tonight, but I had to pick up a few things before Holly and I starting hanging out at Rita’s full time._

Judy hopped out of the cruiser and froze, her prey senses kicking in as she heard a faint noise nearby. The hair prickled on the back of her neck and her ears swiveled, straining to listen.

Suddenly, a dark shape lunged from the darkness of the front yard and swung a large pipe at her.

Judy ducked, the near miss tickling the fur on the top of her head before the pipe smashed into the side of the cruiser. In one fluid motion, Judy rolled away from the vehicle, drew her tranq gun, and shot the assailant twice.

The interior light from the cruiser illuminated her attacker, a badger. He let out a loud hiss and started to take a step towards Judy before he fell back against the cruiser and slumped to the ground.


	6. Chapter 6

_ I’m really glad Rita invited us to stay with her. After the badger attack, it made life easier for the rotating shifts of officers Chief Bogo assigned to protect us, since her place was designed for larger mammals. I’m still on duty as usual during the day, and now I don’t have to worry about Holly and Rita while I’m out looking for Nick. _

_ When I brought up the possibility of the KWK being involved in either Nick’s disappearance or the badger attack, Chief Bogo told me there was a special investigative unit appointed by the mayor’s office that already had them under surveillance. Since I’m currently involved in a court case with their lawyer representing the opposing party, the Chief made it very clear that I must not get involved with any investigation of the KWK. He assured me that the mayor’s office was keeping tabs on my progress searching for Nick, and so far there was no evidence that the KWK was involved in his disappearance. _

 

Judy looked up at Rita and smiled as the elephant sat on the floor next to her. Judy had been sitting at the elephant-sized coffee table in the living room for the past two hours as she went through the case file.

“How’s it going, Judy?”

Judy sighed. “Oh, you know. I’m just frustrated. And worried. And exhausted. Plus Holly was extra cranky tonight while I was putting her to bed.”

Rita nodded. “She’s so quiet most of the time, especially compared to what Nick was like when he was younger. He was so noisy, I could always tell exactly where he was, and what trouble he was getting into, even if I couldn’t see him. And Nick never really liked physical contact much, unlike Holly. She sticks to me like glue.”

Judy nodded. “Yeah, that’s pretty normal behavior for a little bunny.”

Rita put her trunk around Judy’s shoulders as she spoke. “I wish I could help you find Nick.”

Judy touched Rita’s trunk and smiled up at her. “Thanks. You are helping me, Rita, so much. I really appreciate you watching Holly and letting us stay here.”

“You three are like family to me, and you’re always welcome here.” Rita ponderously stood up and yawned. “Well, I’m off to bed. Don’t stay up all night worrying. Like my mom used to say, sometimes a good night’s sleep brings answers.”

 

_ Rita was right, taking a break from the case and getting a few hours of sleep helped me figure something out. I woke up and started wondering if the reason Nick didn’t spell out the person referred to as ‘B’ was because it’s a name people might recognize as sketchy, and he didn’t want that name showing up in his notes. That and the fact that he thought Eddie might be his dad’s shady business partner made me realize I should pay Mr. Big a visit, to see if he knew anything about all this. _

_ But first, I called Angie. She had been having trouble tracking down the families of the foxes and was finally able to get an appointment to talk to one of them. We made plans to meet in the afternoon and go over whatever new information we found that day. _

_ She also told me a rabbit had been reported missing yesterday across town in precinct five. There was no evidence of foul play, and it didn’t sound like it was related to our case, but Angie said she’d follow up on it anyway. _

_ Unfortunately, the badger hasn’t said a word since we brought him in. He didn’t have any ID on him, so we don’t even know what his name is. His prints didn’t show up in the crime database, and we’re working on running his DNA through the system. Meanwhile, I have to fight the urge to go down to headquarters and beat some information out of him. _

_ Mr. Big sent a car to pick me up for our meeting. He recognized Nick’s dad in the picture and said it was probably taken at a place called Feral’s, a bar that was one of John’s favorite hangouts. _

 

Judy showed a picture of the badger to Mr. Big, who shook his head as he spoke. “No, I don’t recognize him.”

“How about Boris? Does that name mean anything to you?”

Mr. Big was silent for several moments before he spoke. “Boris… yes, unfortunately, I know who he is. Mammal trafficking, narcotics, arms smuggling… Boris Scarloff kept a low profile in Zootopia, but rumor has it he was involved in some truly despicable activities overseas. He served time in prison after John snitched on him. If he’s back in town, I haven’t heard anything. Let me see the first picture again.”

 

_ Mr. Big said that Boris worked with a small time importer that used the logo that was on the hat, but they went out of business years ago. He told me to be careful, and that I should go down to the bar and talk to the owner, a coyote named Wanda. _

_ The first name on the list. Hold on, Nick. I’m getting closer. _

_ Thankfully Mr. Big’s limo dropped me off at the park near City Hall before Angie got there so I didn’t have to explain to her where I’d gotten my information. _

_ While I waited for her, I watched a group of demonstrators picketing in the plaza between City Hall and the park. About thirty mammals, both prey and predators, carrying signs saying things like “A Fox Raising a Bunny is Unnatural” and “Kind With Kind”. I really wanted to walk over and give them a piece of my mind, which would have been stupid for several reasons, but luckily for me, Angie arrived first. _

_ She had seen me looking at the protesters before I hopped in her car, and she spoke as I buckled in. _

 

“Should we go harass them?”

Judy laughed. “No, Chief Bogo was pretty clear that I need to stay far away from the protests and the KWK. Besides, I’ve got a lead. Head towards the wharf and I’ll give you directions.”

Angie carefully pulled away from the curb as she spoke to Judy. “You aren’t going to believe what I found out today. I couldn’t find the parents of one of the deceased foxes. They may have skipped town since no one seems to know where they are. But the other one… Zach. You know, the one with a single parent mom. I talked to her, and she recognized John from the picture. She said that he’s Zach’s father.”

“Wait… so one of the dead foxes was Nick’s half brother? Sweet cheese and crackers.”

 

_ I filled in Angie on what I’d learned from Mr. Big as we drove down to the bar. When we got there, it looked pretty sketchy, so I figured this was a good time to test out the new phone app we’d recently gotten at precinct one. It’s called the Beacon App, and it has a couple of uses. Most of the time we just used it to check in. It’s nice because it cuts down on radio chatter, and if we didn’t check in again later, Clawhauser would get a notification and he’d try to contact us. _

_ The second way to use it is more complicated. Once activated, it completely silences all audible alerts on the phone (a feature I can definitely appreciate) and sends a signal that headquarters can use to easily track an officer’s location. It also sends notifications out to the senior officers in the precinct. So far I don’t think anyone in the department has had a chance to use this feature, but it’s nice to know it’s there.  _

_ Angie hadn’t even heard of it. We should rotate officers through the other precincts more often, for this exact reason. _

 

“Ok, there… I’ve checked in, and Clawhauser responded. Now I just have to remember to check in again in about twenty minutes, or Clawhauser will start pestering me.”

Angie smirked. “I’m not worried because I’ve got Deadeye Judy backing me up.”

Judy looked puzzled as she repeated what Angie had said. “Deadeye…Judy?”

“Yeah. Word got around about the badger.”

“Yeah well, he was about five feet away when I shot him.”

“I won’t tell anyone if you don’t.”

Judy laughed and shook her head. “Hey, how about you question Wanda? Again, I’m thinking it would be better for a predator to be asking the questions. Besides, I can keep a better eye on her responses and our surroundings if I’m not the one doing the talking.”

Angie nodded. “Sure.”

Judy and Angie exited the vehicle and walked in the front door of Feral’s.

Behind the bar was a small gray coyote with an eyepatch over her right eye. As they approached, she looked them up and down as she greeted them.

“What can I get you two?”

“Hi, my name is Angelina Vydra, and this is Officer Judy Hopps. Are you Wanda Feral? We’re with the ZPD, and would like to ask--”

“I already talked to an officer the other day.”

“Actually, that’s one of the things we’d like to talk to you about.”

Wanda shrugged. “Ok, but let’s take this into my office.” She nodded to a woodchuck behind the bar before she escorted the officers down a short dark hallway.

 

_ Wanda confirmed that Nick had come by the morning of the day he disappeared. She recognized John and Eddie in the photo and said Nick had shown her a similar photo, as well as another photo of her and both of them standing in front of the bar. She didn’t know anything about the logo, except that John had gotten the hat from someplace he was working. _

_ Angie then asked her if she knew Boris, and where we might find him. _

 

Wanda visibly shuddered before she spoke. “He’s a scary wolverine with a seriously bad attitude. I had a run-in with him once, before he went to prison, and he gave me a little souvenir, so I wouldn’t forget him,” she said as she tapped her eyepatch. “One thing you should realize about Boris... he never forgives, and he never forgets. John’s testimony sent him to prison. If he’s back in town, I’m sure he’s here to find John.”

Angie nodded as she showed Wanda another picture. “Have you seen this badger before?”

Wanda glanced at the clock on the wall and shrugged. “Maybe… there’s a badger who comes in now and then with a group of wolves and a raccoon. I haven’t seen them for a few days, though.”

Angie said, “Well, we appreciate your time--”

Judy interrupted Angie, “Why didn’t you come forward when Nick was reported missing in the news?”

Wanda turned to look at Judy like she’d forgotten she was there. “Bunny, I don’t have time to watch the news, I’m too busy trying to keep this place running.” She glanced at the clock again. “Speaking of which, it’s about to get busy out there, so are we done?”

Angie nodded as she held out a business card for Wanda. “Yes. If you see the wolves or raccoon again, please give us a call.”

Wanda took the card and dropped it on her desk. “Right. And the next time you have any questions, feel free to call me first. If the regulars start seeing cops coming in here, I’ll lose half my customers.”

 

As they got back into the car, Angie asked, “You ok?”

Judy nodded and sighed. “Sorry about that dumb question at the end. It just felt like she was hiding something.”

Angie nodded. “It’s ok, I got the same feeling too. I’ll talk to Chief Hart about putting some surveillance on this place.”

But Judy was barely listening to her as she fiddled with her phone. “Wait, why was the car found so far from here?” She looked at a map on her phone and traced a line between their location and where the car was found.

Angie shrugged. “Maybe Officer Wilde felt like a walk?”

Judy chuckled. “Yeah, I don’t think so. It’s twelve blocks away. It’s still light out, so let’s drive down to where the car was and look around. It can’t hurt, and I need to think.”

As Angie drove toward the wharf, a message crackled over the radio.  _ All precincts, code 207, adult male rabbit abducted  near Savanna Central. Be on the lookout for suspect’s vehicle, described as a large cargo van with peeling blue paint. _

Judy and Angie looked at each other as Judy spoke. “Wait, another missing rabbit? Did you ever find out more about the other one?”

Angie shook her head. “I’m still waiting to hear back from the fifth precinct.”

They drove for several minutes before they crested a hill and looked out across the harbor. “Oh, I almost forgot to check in again with Clawhauser,” Judy said as she started to unlock her phone.

Angie gasped and pulled over. “Judy, look!”

Judy looked up to see where she was pointing. Ahead of them was an old warehouse, the last rays of the sun glinting off the brick wall where a faded white circle with a red W was barely visible.

Judy started to speak but froze as she noticed a cargo van with peeling blue paint pulling up to the loading dock of the building.


	7. Chapter 7

“Are you insane?”

Angie frowned at Judy as they watched two wolves load boxes onto a boat moored behind the warehouse.

Judy shook her head and activated the Beacon app on her phone. While she spoke, two more wolves unloaded a crate from the back of the van. “Look, we don’t have time to argue. I have a hunch that Nick isn’t in the warehouse, and if that boat leaves, we’ll lose it.” The raccoon driver moved the truck out of sight around the side of the warehouse. “The sooner you call for backup, the more likely they’ll get here before that boat leaves.”

“I’m com--”

Judy shook her head, cutting her off. “No. They might smell you, but they probably won’t notice another rabbit.”

 

Judy barely made it aboard before the boat left the dock. She hid under a tarp and listened to the snarling laughs of the wolves and the whimpers of the kidnapped rabbit inside a nearby crate.

The boat skimmed across the water, the glimmering skyline of Zootopia fading into the distance before they arrived at a dock that was barely visible in the dusky light.

The wolves moored the boat and disappeared down a dark passageway, carrying some of the boxes and the crate holding the rabbit.

Tranq gun at the ready, Judy slipped off the boat and followed them.

 

Judy’s ears twitched while she crept along the passage. She froze, listening intently, before diving into a side hallway to hide from the wolves coming towards her. She waited until long after they passed her before she hopped back into the main passage. The sound of rushing water grew steadily louder as she continued down the corridor.

Judy turned the corner to find an open metal door leading into a huge dimly lit room. She stealthily stepped through the door and crouched, her gun raised as she scanned for threats.

The sound of rushing water reverberated off the walls of the room, which was dominated by a large pit. A narrow walkway hugged the pit on one side, and balanced on the edge of the walkway was a cage. It was held in place by a rope that went up through a pulley on the ceiling and back down, fastened to the walkway to keep the cage from sliding on an incline that sloped away from the walkway to a drop-off, a hundred feet above a fast moving river. Near the cage was the crate containing the rabbit.

Judy gasped as she saw Nick stand up in the cage. He was wearing a torn purple t-shirt and ragged jeans, his fur and clothes caked with blood. Judy quietly closed the door behind her and bolted it.

She froze when a wolverine appeared from behind the crate, holding something small in his paw. He approached Nick, who cringed away, causing the cage to tip back slightly.

Judy took careful aim at the wolverine with her tranq gun, but she was startled by the droning sound of a helicopter buzzing over the building. An announcement thundered through the room: **THIS IS THE ZPD… ALL MAMMALS ARE ORDERED TO EXIT THE BUILDING IMMEDIATELY**.

The announcement repeated as Judy looked back at the wolverine. He spotted her and hit a release that freed the rope, causing the cage to slowly start sliding towards the drop-off. Judy fired at the wolverine, but he dodged behind the crate and the darts missed.

Nick reached through the bars and grabbed the rope before he slammed into the top of the cage, which continued to slide. Judy raced to help Nick, and the wolverine seized the opportunity to sprint across the room and barrel through a set of double doors. She holstered her gun and sprinted the last few feet to grab the rope, which halted the cage just as it teetered on the edge of the drop-off.

His leg wrapped around one of the bars, Nick carefully scooted down so he was almost eye to eye with Judy. He spoke with a raspy voice. “I was wondering when you’d show up.”

Judy started to reply, but she was interrupted by the yelping and howling of the wolves, who started pounding on the metal door behind her. There was a crashing sound, and the door shook, but the latch held.

Judy swallowed before she looked back at Nick. She moved closer to him, until they were inches apart, their arms shaking from the strain of holding the rope.

Nick looked at Judy, an odd smile teasing across his face. He spoke again, so softly he could barely be heard over the racket from the wolves. “The cage is locked, Carrots. You have to let me go.”

Tears welled in her eyes, and she shook her head.

Nick hugged the rope and reached out, wrapping his right paw around Judy’s badge, along with a clump of fabric.

Her eyes widened when he pulled her closer.

The sound of the wolves grew louder. They were almost through the metal door.

Nick abruptly let go of the rope and pushed Judy away with both paws. There was a tearing sound, and she lost her grip on the rope and fell backwards. The cage lurched over the edge, Judy’s badge and a sizeable chunk of fabric still clutched in Nick’s hand.

Judy screamed and jumped forward, grabbing a post at the edge of the drop-off to keep herself from falling. She desperately reached for Nick, but the cage was already plunging into the churning water far below.

There was a loud crash. The door flew open, followed by howls of rage from the wolves as they streamed into the room.

Judy turned and ran, bullets skittering off the cement around her. She drew her gun and dashed up the incline towards the double doors, ducking out of sight and moving until one of the wolves was almost on top of her.

He levelled his gun at her. Judy flattened herself against the incline and shot him twice, rolling at the exact moment he returned fire.

Concrete chips sprayed over her, the bullets striking where she had been milliseconds earlier. She kept rolling into a crouch, ready to fire again, when his limp body slid past her and fell over the edge.

There was a sudden commotion on the walkway above her. Officer McHorn shouted, “Drop your weapons and freeze!” The sounds of angry snarls and gunfire filled the room for several minutes, until finally only the rushing water could be heard again. Judy peeked over the edge to see several wolves slumped on the walkway, with several officers fanning out to grab their weapons. She ducked down again and yelled, “It’s Officer Hopps, I’m coming out, don’t shoot!”

Judy slowly crept onto the walkway as more officers with rifles swarmed through the door. A message crackled over McHorn’s radio.

**_We need evac for Officer Wilde down near the dock. Also, if anyone has seen her, tell Officer Hopps to get her tail down here._ **

 

Judy rushed onto the dock to find Nick, waterlogged and wrapped in a blanket, sitting on the ground while he talked to Officer Wolford. She dashed over, slamming into Nick and hugging him tightly.

Nick inhaled sharply before letting out a pained yelp, causing Judy to pull away.

Nick grimaced. “Sorry, I have a few broken ribs.”

“Oh my god Nick, I’m so sorry.” She started to weep, her voice trembling. “How… how in the world did you get out of the cage?”

“I’ll tell you, if you’ll tell me where your cane is.”

Judy laughed nervously through her tears while he spoke. “I’m sorry Carrots, I dropped your badge.” He grinned at her and continued. “I’m just glad I can finally take ‘picking a lock with two of my mom’s old straight pins while holding my breath underwater’ off my bucket list.”

  
  
  



	8. Chapter 8

Judy sat next to Nick as they rode in the police boat through the darkening night. He flinched when she grabbed his paw and looked at her with haunted eyes.

“Sorry, Carrots. I… “

He trailed off as Judy clasped her paws together in her lap and looked away to avoid his gaze. “No Nick, I’m sorry--”

“Judy, you’re bleeding!”

 

_ It was just a scratch on the back of my neck, but Nick got extremely agitated and wouldn’t stop freaking out until I went to have one of the other officers look at it. After I got it bandaged, I came back and found Nick curled up in the blanket, asleep. I desperately wanted to hold him as he twitched and whined from troubled dreams, but I was afraid I’d startle him again. _

_ When we got to the dock, I didn’t want to let Nick out of my sight, but the paramedic made me ride in the front of the ambulance. Right after I climbed into the passenger seat, Chief Bogo called and told me to wait for him at the hospital. My head was a jumbled mess, or I would have realized why the Chief needed to talk to me. _

_ The press must have gotten wind of what was going on because a few camera crews were waiting for us when we arrived. Nick was hyped up on painkillers, so he barely noticed when they crowded around while he was pulled out of the ambulance and wheeled into the hospital. _

 

“I’m sorry Miss, but only family members are allowed in the treatment area.”

“But, I’m his… partner.”

The leopard shrugged. “Sorry, it’s hospital policy. I don’t make the rules.”

“Go home Judy. Holly needs you,” Nick sleepily slurred his words as the leopard wheeled the gurney through the door.

“I’ll come by with her tomorrow--” The door shut and Nick was gone before Judy could finish. 

Judy walked to the waiting room, where she flopped down in a chair and rubbed her eyes.

“Miss Hopps?”

A nurse towered over her. Judy looked up at the rhino, who smiled as she continued. “I remember you, from when you were a patient here, and of course your cute daughter.” She shook her head as she continued. “And Nick... he pestered all of us until one of the nurses finally showed him how to feed your little bunny.” 

The rhino chuckled before she continued. “After that, he brought us donuts every day, in return for us distracting your mom so he would get his fair share of turns at feeding time. Don’t worry, I’ll go check on him and let you know how he’s doing.”

 

_ Oh geez, my mom. I hadn’t returned her frantic voicemail after Nick went missing. I texted her and told her everything was fine and ignored the twenty other voicemails she and my dad left. I just couldn’t deal with the added stress of their overprotective worrying on top of everything else. _

_ I’d also completely neglected to tell them about the badger attack, and I should probably tell them we found Nick, and then there was all the dangerous stuff I did today. I dreaded it, but I knew I had to prepare them for what they would be seeing on the news soon. _

_ After I finally dialed her number, my mom answered on the first ring. They took things pretty well, at least after they got in fifteen solid minutes of scolding me for not calling them sooner. _

 

“He’s dehydrated, and aside from a bite wound on his shoulder and a few broken ribs, he’s in good shape…” The nurse paused and smiled encouragingly as she continued. “The forensics guys are taking pictures of his injuries and interviewing him. Visiting hours start at 8am, so he should be settled in a room by then.”

 

_ Chief Bogo came by to tell me they found the body of the wolf I shot. He had drowned after he fell off the ledge. I should have filed a report before I left the scene, but he reassured me that, given the circumstances, I shouldn’t worry. _

_ Chief Bogo confiscated my weapon and gave me a replacement. I also had to get blood drawn and describe to him in detail what happened after I found Nick. He told me again not to worry, this was standard procedure in situations like this. Of course, I remember reading about how they check your blood to make sure you weren’t impaired and they verify that your weapon was loaded with the proper darts, but that isn’t the same as having to actually go through all of it after a deadly shooting. _

_ Even though I shot him in self-defense, it still bothers me. I’ve never taken a mammal’s life before. I don’t even like to squash bugs. I need to think about this more, but my brain is too overloaded right now to process it. _

_ The Chief wanted me to talk to a shrink, but I said I’d see one tomorrow. I just wanted to go home. I needed to check on Holly and try to get some sleep. I’m now on paid leave until the mammals at internal affairs can sort things out. I tried to ask how the investigation was going, but the Chief shook his head and told me to worry about it tomorrow. _

_ I caught a ride home with Francine, who was relieving Delgato and Wolford. I don’t know how much longer Bogo will assign officers to protect us, but I’m glad to have another one around tonight. _

 

“Just text me if you want to come in later and take a break,” Judy said before she hopped out of the oversized police cruiser.

“Oh, I will. I had a few cups of coffee earlier, so…” Judy and Francine both laughed as Judy struggled for a moment to close the large passenger door.

 

Judy came in through the smaller front entrance and locked it behind her. She made her way down the dim hallway to check on Holly, who was sound asleep in her crib. Quietly shutting the door, she yawned and stepped into the guest bathroom.

As the steam from the shower fogged the mirror, Judy removed the bandage on her neck and checked the wound. She stood and stared at the splotch of red on the dressing for a few moments before tossing it in the trash. Judy touched the torn fabric where her badge had been before stripping down and stepping into the shower.

 

Dressed in a clean ZPD tank top and gray sweatpants, Judy dried the fur on her head and ears as she walked into the living room, where she was surprised to find Rita sitting on the couch.

“Hi, Judy.” Rita yawned and patted the couch. “Come sit next to me so we can talk.”

Judy grinned. “Sorry if I woke you, but I’m glad you’re awake.”

  
  


_ I’m still so very thankful for Rita. She already heard from one of the other officers that we had rescued Nick. She tried to take my mind off of things, telling me how Holly was babbling but still not really saying any words besides mom, and how the officers protecting us really enjoy seeing Holly. I even had a welcome laugh when Rita told me about the first time Officer Delgato picked her up and she pulled on the tiger’s whiskers. Then I cried for a bit as she hugged me with her trunk. _

_ The morning news was all about the events of the day before. Pictures of me, the rescued bunny, and Nick were plastered everywhere. They talked about the bunny we had rescued, along with Nick. They showed the video of Nick in the bloody purple shirt being wheeled into the hospital. They also mentioned the remains of the first missing rabbit had been found, and the death of the wolf during the raid. Boris, five wolves, and the raccoon were all in custody. Speculation was rampant, as everyone waited for an official announcement from the mayor’s office, scheduled for later today. _

_ But the worst news of all was still waiting for me at the hospital when I got there with Holly at 8am. _


	9. Chapter 9

_ When Holly and I arrived at the hospital to see Nick, the mammal at the information desk told us he hadn’t been admitted the previous night. No one would tell me what was going on. Finally, I ran into the nurse from last night. She told me that Nick had voluntarily committed himself to the hospital’s psychiatric ward earlier that morning. _

 

Judy held Holly on her right hip and fiddled with a white diaper bag slung over her shoulder as she waited impatiently for the old goat behind the desk to notice them.

Finally, the goat looked up from her computer and eyed them somberly.

Judy spoke rapidly. “Hi, I’m here to see a patient named Nick… Nick Wilde.”

“I can’t confirm or deny that there are any patients currently at this facility with that name. However, visiting hours are between 4pm and 7pm during the week, and 1pm to 7pm on the weekend.” She glanced at Holly. “And no visitors under the age of twelve are allowed.”

“Ok… assuming Nick is a patient, can I call him on the phone?”

“Yes.”

“Can you give me his phone number?”

“No.”

“Then how am I supposed to call him?”

“He would have to give you his phone number.”

“But how can I reach him to tell him to give me his phone number?”

“He would have to call you from the phone in his room to give you his number.”

Judy tried to remain calm.

“How can I tell him to call me so he can give me his number if I don’t… you know what, nevermind. Can I write him a note, to tell him to call me?”

“Yes.”

Judy shifted Holly to her left hip as she scribbled on a scrap of paper.  _ Nick, please call me. Love, Judy. _

“Can you give Nick this message?”

“No.”

“But you just said I could write Nick--”

“I can’t confirm or deny that there--”

“Ok, ok… fine. Assuming he is actually a patient here, what do I have to do to see him today?”

The goat went back to work on the computer as she spoke. “You can come back and fill out a visitor request form at 4pm.”

 

_ I swear, I thought talking to Flash was aggravating… at least he was trying to be helpful, unlike that old goat I talked to today. _

_ This is maddening. I need to see Nick. I actually considered committing myself, just to talk to him, except they probably separate predators and prey, and I don’t know if they intermingle genders either. Also, spending time in a psychiatric facility right now probably isn’t a great idea, what with the upcoming hearing to determine if I’m a fit parent or not. Although I swear I may end up getting committed anyway, the way things are going. _

_ On the way back to Rita’s, a porcupine was distributing fliers on the train. He gave me one, and I flew off the handle when I saw that it was for a _ _ KWK protest tomorrow at the hospital. Seriously? I yelled at him, and Holly started to cry, which made me feel terrible. And then the jerk snuck off while I was busy consoling her. _

_ Bogo called to tell me they were temporarily transferring the cruiser to the second precinct since Nick and I are on leave. He didn’t fill me in on the details, except that they needed it for crowd control. This sounded ominous, given that the mayor’s office would be announcing something later this morning. All these things happening around me… I feel like my life is falling apart, and there isn’t anything I can do to stop it. _

 

Holly hopped back and forth between Judy, who was sitting on a chair next to the coffee table, and Rita, who was stretched out on the living room floor. Holly giggled as she alternated between crawling under the coffee table to grab Judy’s dangling feet and hiding behind Rita’s trunk. Holly peeked out from under the table and Judy surprised her, causing the tiny bunny to shriek and laugh as she bounded back to Rita.

Judy’s ears swiveled to listen to the television as the announcer introduced the mayor’s assistant.

“Come on, little bunny, let’s get changed and ready for lunch,” Rita said as she scooped Holly up with her trunk. The elephant winked at Judy. “Come join us later in the dining room and let me know what the mayor says.”

Judy’s eyes were already glued to the tv, but she turned to smile at Rita. “Thanks, Rita.” Judy returned Holly’s wave as the elephant carried her out of the room.

A well-dressed panther walked up to a podium filled with microphones and began speaking.

“ _ Good morning, ladies and gentlemammals. As you are all aware, last night several individuals were apprehended at the abandoned water treatment plant across the bay. Through the coordinated efforts of several ZPD precincts, the two kidnapped mammals, a rabbit named Toby McHare, and a fox, ZPD Officer Nick Wilde, were rescued. We want to assure the citizens of Zootopia that all mammals suspected of being involved in the recent kidnappings and homicides are in police custody. They will be charged in the next few days, but only after a thorough investigation has been completed. In the meantime, we are asking the media and the public to refrain from unfounded speculation as investigators work around the clock to clarify exactly what events occurred, and who will face charges. Any further developments will be made available to the public as we become aware of them. There will be no further comments at this time. _ ”

 

_ After I fed her lunch, I kissed my little bun goodbye and ran to catch the train. I had two meetings that afternoon, one with the internal affairs rep and another with someone in the district attorney's office. Not having a car to get around is making things even more difficult than they are already. _

_ I rushed to see Nick at 4pm, but he already had visitors, so I waited. _

Judy was filling out the visitor form when her lawyer, Jimmy the Weasel, tapped her on the shoulder.

“I’m glad I ran into you, Judy. We should schedule some time to talk before the hearing next month.”

“Oh, hello Jimmy. Wait… what are you doing here?”

Jimmy leaned in so he could talk quietly to Judy.

“I don’t have time to talk now because I’m already late. The ZPD internal affairs representative and someone from the DA’s office are both here to speak with Nick, and I need to be there while they question him. But I promise, I’ll call you tomorrow--”

“No, I’ll wait and talk to you afterward. Can you please tell Nick that I need to see him?”

Jimmy nodded. “Of course. I’ll talk to you soon.” He rushed over to the goat and gave her a sheet of paper before he was escorted through the security door.

Judy watched him go. She sighed, her ears drooping as she continued to fill out the form.

 

_ I waited for hours, but 7pm came and went and they still weren’t done. I begged the hippo blocking the security door to let me talk to Nick, but he shook his head and told me to come back tomorrow. I almost thought about trying to get past him anyway, but Jimmy finally came out with a group of other mammals before I did anything dumb. _

_ Jimmy wanted to know if I would proceed with the hearing next month without Nick, or if I wanted him to postpone it again. It didn’t even occur to me that Nick might not be there with me in court. I felt totally numb inside as I told him to go ahead and postpone it, if Nick wasn’t out before then.  _

_ I kept hoping Nick would call me. I’ve checked my phone a hundred times today, to make sure I haven’t missed any calls. The trip home on the train that night was the most alone I’ve ever felt. _

_ I don’t know why, but I watched the news tonight. I should have known that would be a bad idea. _

 

Judy was sprawled out next to Rita on the elephant sized couch as they watched the television. “ _ In our top story tonight, we’ve obtained exclusive footage related to the string of homicides and kidnappings that have plagued our fair city. W _ e _ must warn our viewers, the footage we are about to show you is graphic. Viewer discretion is advised. _ ”

The video was dark and grainy. Wolves could be heard laughing and howling in the background as a small white rabbit cowered on the ground.

Suddenly, a fox wearing a purple t-shirt and jeans appeared and grabbed the rabbit in his jaws. As the rabbit screamed and the fox began to shake him, the video paused and was replaced by another video of Nick arriving at the hospital as the newscaster spoke again.

“ _ Viewers should note the similar clothing worn by both the attacking fox and the clothing worn by Officer Wilde when he arrived at Zootopia General Hospital last night, where he is  _ _ currently being held in the psychiatric ward. _ ”

Judy gasped and looked at Rita. “Did they seriously just say Nick attacked that rabbit?”

 

_ I was absolutely furious after I saw the news report. They claimed that the footage had been recovered from the water treatment plant. First of all, any idiot could see that the fox who attacked the rabbit wasn’t Nick. Maybe the fox was Eddie? The location looked like where I’d found Nick. Were those Eddie’s clothes that Nick was wearing when I found him? _

_ But the way they presented the footage… everyone is going to assume it was Nick. How did they even get their paws on it? And why did they say that he was being “held” at the hospital, when he voluntarily committed himself? _

_ I’m exhausted, but I can’t sleep. Holly was cranky at bedtime tonight, and we’re both restless. Rita said she’s probably reacting to me being stressed out. _

 

Judy finished changing Holly’s diaper as she said, “Wow, little bun, that was quite an icky diaper. What have we been feeding you?”

Holly said, “Ick.”

Judy laughed. “That’s right, ick…” the last word caught in her throat as she looked at Holly’s face. Tears streamed down the baby bunny's cheeks as she reached for a picture of Nick on the nightstand. “Ick.”


	10. Chapter 10

_ Poor Rita came in to find both of us blubbering on the floor. I completely lost it. I don’t think I’ve ever cried like that before in my entire life. I’ve been so self absorbed lately, I didn’t stop to think about how much Holly misses Nick too. _

_ I got a phone call from Dr. Adams, who is Nick’s psychiatrist. He asked me to come see him this afternoon at the hospital, so we could talk about Nick. Finally, I’d get some answers. _

_ I was practically climbing the walls at Rita’s house today, until I took an early train to the hospital. There were a few dozen protesters near the main entrance. I tried to ignore all the hate filled signs as I pushed my way through them. Thankfully no one recognized me. _

_ It was agonizing sitting in the waiting room, since I showed up at the doctor’s office almost an hour early. _

 

Dr. Adams, an old sun bear with a graying muzzle and dark horn-rimmed glasses, looked down at Judy solemnly as he spoke. “I appreciate you coming in to speak with me. Since what happened to Nick will come out soon, either in a trial or leaked to the press, he wanted you to hear the facts from him first.”

Judy replied angrily, “Then why won’t he tell them to me, face to face?”

The bear shook his head gravely. “He isn’t ready. Please realize, Miss Hopps, that Nick has been seriously traumatized by--”

“Fine.” Judy’s ears drooped as she interrupted him. “I need answers, so I’ll take what I can get.”

“Nick told me to record our session yesterday, so you could listen to it.” Dr. Adams typed on the keyboard of his computer, and the playback started. 

 

_ Nick sounded like his usual self as he spoke. “So Doc, where should I start?” _

_ “Just start at the beginning.” _

_ “Well, my mom told me I was conceived in the Riviera. Not the Riviera with the fancy resorts and sparkling beaches… the Riviera car that my dad drove everywhere.” _

_ Dr. Adams sighed loudly. “Maybe we could start with something that happened a little more recently?” _

_ “Sure thing, doc. It wasn’t that many days ago, but it feels like it's been months since I dropped Judy off at headquarters. After I said goodbye to her, I went to check out a bar near the wharf named Feral’s. I’d found a few old pictures of my dad and his friend Eddie, who it just so happens was the first fox to go missing awhile back. One of the pictures was taken in front of Feral’s. It was a long shot, but I figured it was worth checking out. And whaddya know, the owner, a one-eyed coyote named Wanda, remembered them. _

_ “During my chat with Wanda, I asked her about a logo on the hats that my dad and Eddie were wearing, a red W inside a white circle. She didn’t know what it was, but she mentioned the hats were from someplace they worked. I remember my mom telling me once that my dad had a job working down at the docks, and that got me thinking. I vaguely remembered seeing the logo somewhere down there, so when we finished talking, I went to check out some warehouses in the area where I ran into some of… his goons while I was snooping around.” _

_ “These mammals, they were the ones that abducted you, and took you to Boris?” _

_ “Yeah. They were careful. I never did hear any of their names. But there was a racoon, a badger, and six wolves. And of course...” Nick paused for a long time before he continued. “Boris, a particularly ill-tempered wolverine. _

_ “Anyway, I saw a warehouse with a faded red W on it. There were some wolves loading boxes on a boat docked behind the building. I drove past and parked a few blocks away, thinking this would help me avoid any unwanted attention. Boy was I wrong. It was a dumb rookie move on my part. I should have called it in first, even though I didn’t have any proof of wrongdoing. But, like an idiot, I decided to snoop around first on my own. _

_ “They got the drop on me, in the alley next to the warehouse. They put a bag over my head and took me for a little boat ride to meet Boris.” _

_ Nick cleared his throat and paused for a few moments before he spoke again. “Boris knew who I was, since his crew had found my ID when they emptied my pockets. He asked me why I was skulking around the warehouse, and then he demanded that I tell him where my dad and siblings were. I told him I had no idea where my dad was, and that I didn’t have any siblings. _

_ I also shared a few insightful observations about his parentage and which orifice he could stick his questions in, and he responded by breaking a few of my ribs. Some folks just don’t have a sense of humor.” _

_ Dr. Adams coughed as he tried to hide a chuckle. “Then what happened?” _

_ “After Boris was done practicing his soccer kick on me, he dumped me in a cage.” _

_ “A cage?” _

_ “Yeah, they kept me in a cage, next to a large pit. The cage was hanging over a river, inside the old water treatment plant. Eddie was in the cage too. After Boris and the other mammals cleared out I was able to talk with Eddie. _

_ “He asked me about my siblings and my dad. I told him that having siblings was news to me, and I haven’t seen my dad in years. Eddie told me not to hide anything if I was protecting him. Like I’d do that, even if I had any idea where he was.” _

_ “What can you tell me about your siblings?” _

_ “Not much. Wanda joked that my dad would chase anything that moved, and how she was lucky she was faster than he was. I guess she wasn’t kidding, because the two other abducted foxes were my half brothers.” _

_ “How does that make you feel? Having brothers that you didn’t know about?” _

_ Nick was silent for a moment. “Just sad, because I know what my dad was like. I feel bad that he had other kids. I’m sure he was a terrible parent to them too.” _

_ “Do you want to talk about your dad?” _

_ “Not even a little bit.” _

_ There were several seconds of silence before Dr. Adams spoke. “Can you tell me what happened next?”  _

_ Nick was silent for a long, long time. His voice quavered when he finally spoke. “Later that night, they brought a… rabbit in. At first, I panicked, thinking it was Judy, but I realized he was a young buck with white fur when I got a better look at him. They dropped him in the pit. I remember how afraid he was, as he sat trembling down there.” _

_ Nick growled quietly before he continued. “They pumped Eddie full of something from a syringe, and threw him in the pit too. One of the wolves videotaped Eddie as he… as he…” _

_ Nick wept for a few moments before Dr. Adams said, “We don’t have to talk about this now, if--” _

_ “No, it’s ok. I need to talk about it.” _

_ Nick said nothing for several seconds before he continued. “Eddie tore the rabbit to pieces while the wolves and Boris just watched and laughed.” _

_ Nick spoke again, his voice flat. “After Eddie was… done, Boris threatened me again, said I had to tell him where my dad was, or else. I had nothing to give him, though, so he… he and the wolves dragged Eddie out of the pit and threw him in the cage with me. Eddie went nuts, he attacked me and bit me on the shoulder before I was able to wrestle him to the ground. _

_ “Eddie’s face was covered in blood. Not his blood. The rabbit’s blood. I smelled it, and it… I don’t know. I couldn’t stop. I had him in a chokehold, and I kept squeezing… I couldn’t stop. All I could think about was the rabbit… “  _

 

Nick trailed off as he wept loudly, and there was a break in the recording. The recording started again, and Nick spoke calmly.

 

_ “All the mammals left for awhile after that, leaving me alone with Eddie’s body, when I got an idea. For once, I’m glad my teacher in high school made me read The Count of Marmot Cristo--” _

_ “I’m sorry, the count of… what?” _

_ “Nevermind. I just got the idea of switching clothes with Eddie and hiding his body under a blanket. I hoped they would drag me off, thinking I was Eddie, so I could escape. I figured there wasn’t much of a chance that would work, so I also had a contingency plan.” _

_ “Interesting. Go on.” _

_ “I’d been playing with a metal disk, about the size of a quarter, that I’d found in the cage. I’d been scratching something on one side with my claw when I was bored, but I realized that even if they noticed the clothing swap, I could still use the disk to get a message out. I hurriedly scratched BORIS on the blank side and stuck it in the pocket of the pants with a wad of gum one of the guards had dropped. I figured either I would escape, or…” _

_ Nick paused before he continued in a shaky voice.  _

_ “Or Judy would hear about a dead fox turning up wearing my clothes and figure out what the disk in his pocket meant.” _

_ Nick was quiet for several moments before he began to breathe in an odd, raspy way. “The hardest part was smearing… smearing the blood on my face.” _

 

Nick whined before he broke down completely, and the recording paused. When the recording resumed, Nick’s voice had returned to normal.

 

_ “I’m sorry about that.” _

_ “It’s ok. We can take a break--” _

_ “No, I need to finish.” _

_ Nick cleared his throat and continued. “Like I said before, I swapped clothes, but the racoon noticed when they came to move the body. I couldn’t help flinching when he kicked me in the ribs. Luckily they just grabbed Eddie’s body and didn’t search his pockets and find the disk.” _

_ Nick paused for a moment before he continued. “It was odd, what the raccoon said. ‘Remember what the boss told us. Make sure they find the body, so it gets in the news quickly’. I think Boris was hoping my dad would hear about the dead foxes and come out of hiding.” _

_ “There’s something else, isn’t there?” _

_ There was a long silence before Nick spoke. “It’s the worst part of all. I’m not sure if I’m ready to share it, but I have to.” _

_ “Take your time, there’s no hurry. I promise you I won’t judge you, and I’m here to help you with whatever it is.” _

_ “Thanks, doc.” _

_ Nick took a deep breath and exhaled before he continued. “I was so hungry. I hadn’t eaten in awhile, and Boris came in. He was eating something. I couldn’t tell what it was, but smelling it really made my stomach growl. He just walked back and forth near my cage, eating and staring at me. _

_ “Boris was crazy. He never used names when he talked about his minions, he always said, ‘my eyes’ or some other weird euphemism instead. Anyway, after he’d wandered back and forth in front of the cage for awhile, he told the racoon, ‘Tell my eyes to go find Nick’s little bunnies. I’ve started to get…’” _

_ Nick sobbed once and then continued. “‘I’ve started to get a taste for them’ and then he said to me, ‘for luck, fox’ as he threw the white rabbit’s leg into the cage. I’ll never forget what he said, or the look on his face. I feel like I’m going to throw up just thinking about it.” _

_ Nick begin to sob again as Dr. Adams spoke. “It’s ok Nick. You had nothing to do with the terrible things that Boris did.” _

_ Nick breathed heavily for a few moments before he replied. “I know. I feel bad, I just kicked the leg out of the cage and it fell into the river. I can’t even describe how awful I felt at that moment. I’ve never felt so… helpless, so… empty. _

_ “Sometime that evening, the gang of idiots came back, and I noticed the badger was missing. They didn’t say anything, but I knew… I knew they hadn’t gotten to Judy or Holly. I’m so proud of Judy. I heard what happened… she kicked that badger’s ass when he tried to sneak up on her at the house. I wish I’d known what she’d done back then, because tormenting Boris and his gang about it would have been great. Even though they probably would have broken the rest of my ribs, it would have been worth it.” _

 

There was a break in the recording. When it started again, Nick spoke quietly.

 

_ “After Judy found me, we were riding in the police boat, and… she was bleeding. It was just a scratch, but I could smell it, even before I saw it. I… it… I don’t know how to explain it. It made me think of Boris, and the rabbit being torn apart, and me strangling Eddie to death. Killing Eddie. Murdering Eddie, as I smelled that dead rabbit’s blood.” _

 

The recording ended, and Doctor Adams waited patiently as Judy wept. After a few minutes, Judy wiped her eyes. She asked, “Is there more?”

Doctor Adams handed her a letter. “Only this. He wrote it this morning, and wanted you to have it after you’d finished listening.”

Judy opened the letter and read:

  
  


_ My Dearest Judy, _

 

_ I wish I could talk to you about this face to face, but now that you know what happened to me, I hope you understand why I can’t. I’m sorry for how stressful this is for you, and I want you to know that I miss you and Holly so much right now. I love you both, which is why I can’t see you. Boris screwed me up in a way that I don’t think a non-predator can understand. _

_ You’ve listened to my session with Dr. Adams, and you know what I did to Eddie. I watched him tear that rabbit to pieces, and then I murdered him. Jimmy thinks I won’t be charged, since I was acting in self defense, but the cold hard fact is that Eddie is dead because of me. I’ll have to live with that for the rest of my life. _

_ But that isn’t even the worst part. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to trust myself around you or Holly after what happened. I’m sorry Judy, but I just can’t risk it. I can’t even begin to tell you about the nightmares I’ve been having. I feel like I’m losing my mind, and I know I’m hurting you right now, but I’m afraid of how much more I could hurt you and Holly. _

_ And before you get any wild ideas in that dumb bunny head of yours, I’ve seen the protestors outside the hospital, from the common room window. I’m nothing but a liability right now, and you don’t need me screwing things up at the hearing next month. _

_ I’m giving you the car and the house. Jimmy is drawing up the paperwork, and he should have it for you soon. I love you, Judy Hopps, and I hope someday you can forgive me. Please take care of Holly, and take care of yourself. _

 

_ Nick _


	11. Chapter 11

_Dr. Adams asked if I wanted to talk about anything. I asked if I could see Nick, but he said I couldn’t. Having visitors was entirely up to Nick, and he wasn’t seeing anyone right now._

_Then I asked him if I could write Nick a letter. Dr. Adams said he’d give him my letter, but there was no guarantee that Nick would read it._

 

Judy sat at the coffee table in Rita’s living room amidst a pile of crumpled up papers as she tried again to write a letter to Nick:

_Nick,_

_You’re an idiot. Holly and I love you, and we need to see you._

_Judy_

Judy sighed before crumpling up the letter and dropping it with the others. She put the pencil down and held her head in her paws.

 

_I just want to kick the door down and go in after Nick, but getting fired and going to jail right before I go back to court to fight for custody of Holly probably wouldn’t be such a great idea. I’ve gone over and over it in my head… what can I say or do to fix this? And I keep coming back to a terrible answer: nothing. The proverbial ball is in Nick’s court, and I can’t make him serve it back to me if he doesn’t even want to play. I keep imagining Nick telling me, “You just have to be patient, Carrots.” But how am I supposed to be patient, when Nick is trying to disappear from our lives forever?_

_I have to wonder, if Nick were in my place, what would he do? Something really clever and incredibly stupid, no doubt. All my ideas so far only fall into the stupid category, so now I’m trying to figure out some clever ones._

_Chief Bogo called to tell me that later this morning the mayor’s office will announce whether the DA would be filing charges against Nick or not, at the amphitheater in the park a few blocks from City Hall. I asked to get put on the protection detail, but he said absolutely not, and not just because I’m still on administrative leave._

_Instead, he told me to stay home and watch it on TV. It’s interesting that Chief Bogo felt the need to call and tell me about an event he then warned me not to attend, and since Nick hadn’t tried to stop me from going, or even given me any indication that he’d be there… I knew it probably wouldn’t be safe, but I had to go. If there was any chance he would be there, I had to see him. Even if it was from thirty yards away, with an angry mob and a line of mammals in riot gear between us._

_Thankfully Rita came with me and Holly. The small elephant was big enough to make navigating the crowd easier, and we were able to get close to the corner of the stage. We found a spot alongside a group of elephants, almost right in front of the line of officers in riot gear._

_While we waited, Rita did her best to distract me from the mammals around us who were holding signs like “it isn’t safe for a fox to care for a bunny” and other more hateful KWK slogans._

 

Chief Bogo and several officers stood in a semicircle behind the mayor’s assistant and a podium packed with microphones. The dark fur of the panther glistened in the sunlight as she prepared to address the crowd, her slender form standing out in stark relief against the faded yellows and reds of the leaves in the trees behind her.

“Good morning, ladies and gentlemammals. The ZPD, after a careful review of the facts and circumstances surrounding the death of Edward Escurro, in conjunction with the Zootopia District Attorney’s Office, has determined that Officer Nicholas Wilde was justified in the use of force to defend himself.”

Several mammals booed, while one shouted, “What about Henry?” as he waved a sign that loudly proclaimed _Justice for Henry_.

The panther continued. “A thorough investigation has also determined that the death of the rabbit, a Mr. Henry Lapin, was a direct result of trauma inflicted by Mr. Escurro. The attempts by some to paint Officer Wilde as the culprit in this matter are unfortunate and misguided. All inquiries related--”

The crowd got louder and angrier, drowning out the panther's words as several protesters in the crowd reacted to the announcement, shouting threats and waving their signs.

Judy noticed a nearby group of porcupines. “Oh sweet cheese and crackers.”

 

_As the crowd got riled up, I saw the porcupine who was handing out fliers on the train yesterday, at the same moment he saw me. He obviously recognized me, too, as he and a few other porcupines barged towards us, animals scattering quickly out of their way to avoid their quills._

_I tried to get Rita to hold Holly for me, but when she saw what was happening, she picked me up with her trunk and held me over her head. Holly clung to me, as we dangled just above the level of the stage. I looked down at the officers in front of us, and a few of them peered back up at me uneasily._

_And then I saw Nick, standing next to Jimmy. Nick was wearing a yellow hawaiian shirt, but he didn’t have his sunglasses on. His face was expressionless, and he was squinting in the bright light as he looked at the angry crowd._

_It’s weird how everything seemed to move in slow motion after that, as my adrenaline kicked in. Heads turned as Rita and one of the other elephants started yelling at the porcupines, and Holly suddenly spotted Nick._

_She made a noise I’ve never heard her or any other bunny make before. It was a cross between an excited scream and a bunny war cry, if such a thing ever existed. What really amazed me was how loud it was. More heads turned to look at us as Holly squirmed out of my paws and lept onto the stage, where she landed and immediately made a beeline for Nick._

_It was pure bedlam after that. Officers huddled around Nick and the panther protectively, and several protesters surged forward, thinking another mammal had broken through the line of police and was making a run at Nick, which technically was true._

_I yelled and pounded on Rita’s trunk with my paws, trying to get her attention so she’d let me go. It was too loud, and she didn’t notice me while she argued with the porcupines._

_I swear my heart stopped when I looked up to see two of the officers I didn’t recognize raise their tranq guns and take aim at Holly. My screams were lost in the noise of the crowd, but luckily Chief Bogo intervened and bellowed for everyone to stand down as Holly dashed right between one of the officer’s legs and out of sight._

_As the line of police started to push us away from the stage, Rita looked at me and realized I wasn’t holding Holly anymore. She loosened her grip enough for me to break free and leap onto the stage, just as the part of the crowd furthest from us let out a collective gasp._

_I still couldn’t see what was happening, as I raced towards the group of mammals gathered around Nick, but whatever it was, the effect on the crowd was… well, I can’t think of a single word to describe it. I suppose the best I can do is to simply wax poetic, and say that as they watched whatever was happening, a shroud of silence enveloped the crowd._

_When I got closer, Chief Bogo yelled for several of the officers to move out of the way and I saw Nick doing something I never in a million years would have imagined him doing, especially in front of so many strangers._

_He was sitting on the ground, weeping, as he held Holly._

 

_More than a few signs were left behind on the ground at the park that day. That night on the evening news, I got a birds eye view of what had happened, along with hundreds of thousands of other Zootopians. It was a scene that would get played over and over for the next few days as the rest of Nick’s story unfolded._

_I saw the parts I’d missed, like the dumbfounded looks on the faces of the mammals on the stage who stood gaping at Holly as she barrelled towards them. Except Chief Bogo, who stood calmly before he shouted at the officers to hold their fire and move out of the way as I came running across the stage._

_When Nick finally spotted Holly, the look on his face was pure terror. He took a step back and held up his arms, as if to ward off a blow, and Holly jumped right into him and knocked him over. He tried to pull her away, but she wouldn’t let go of him. He finally gave up, and he just wept and held Holly, who couldn’t hold still as she rubbed her face on his and hugged him back._

_When we were finally able to pry Holly off of him, Nick reluctantly agreed that I could come visit him at the hospital tomorrow. He said he’d wear a muzzle, as a precaution, but I told him there was no way in hell he was hiding from me behind a muzzle, or anything else, ever again._

_I so badly wanted to hold him, but I knew he wasn’t ready for that yet._

 

_***_

 

_He looked so thin when I saw him yesterday. I brought him a blueberry muffin from our favorite coffee shop when I visited. Normally he would have scarfed it down in two bites, but today he just picked at it while we talked._

 

“I know you, Nicholas Wilde. Maybe even better than you know yourself, at least some of the time. Don’t run from two bunnies. We aren’t that scary.”

He didn’t look at Judy as he spoke hesitantly. “I’m not afraid of you, I’m afraid of me. I don’t trust me anymore.”

Judy reached out and touched his arm, but he flinched and she drew back and clasped her paws together in front of her on the table as she replied, “I do. And I trust us. I want to just dive right in and fix everything, right now. But I realize that I can’t, at least not this time. And you just want to hide in the shed forever, but guess what? You can’t, because we won’t let you. I can’t fix this, and you can’t fix this… but… we can. We can work through this. Together. I need you to get this through your thick skull, Nick. Together, we can do things that neither of us can do when we’re alone… when we’re apart. And I’m not just talking about saving the city from night howlers.

“I know things won’t just go right back to the way they were before all this happened. Luckily I’m getting pretty good at being patient, you know.”

Nick smiled when he heard the last part.

“Take all the time you want to hide and work through this, but please… please don’t shut us out. You won’t hurt us, Nick.”

Nick still refused to look at her as he spoke. “How do you know, though? Would you bet your life on it, or Holly’s?”

“I already have.”

Nick slowly turned to look at Judy and froze, a bit of muffin halfway to his open mouth, as she continued.

“Just coming to the park yesterday was a risk, if things got ugly. But I can take care of Holly, and I can take care of myself. Life is full of risk, Nick.”

He lowered his paw and closed his mouth, putting the muffin on the table and reaching out to cover her paws with one of his as he looked away again while she continued. “I figured Holly would react when she saw you, though I had no idea she’d react that strongly. I wasn’t sure how I would get close enough for you to see us. But I guess our clever little superbunny figured that part out for me.” Judy shrugged and looked down at their paws on the table. “I knew… I just knew, if you saw us… “

Nick shook his head as he spoke. “You… you’re one sly, hustling bunny, Judy.”

She smiled. “And you’re my wonderful, dumb fox. That instinct that you’re focused on right now, just remember that it isn’t the only one you’ve got, and it definitely isn’t the strongest one.”

Nick let go of Judy’s paws and picked at the muffin for a few minutes before he spoke again. “So… was she actually saying my name, or was she just telling me that I’m gross?”

Judy chuckled as her mouth quirked into a smile. “I dunno. You’ll just have to ask her yourself, when you’re ready.”

They sat together in silence until Nick finally finished eating.

Tears welled in Judy’s eyes as she started to chuckle, before she finally broke down and laughed.

“What’s so funny, Carrots?”

“Nick, you should have seen how far she jumped… you really did teach her how to fly.”


	12. Chapter 12

_ It’s amazing the power a few tears can have, especially when they’re coming out of an emotionally stunted fox as hundreds of thousands of mammals watch while a little bunny is hanging on to him and refusing to let go. _

_ It felt like the protests around the city evaporated after Nick and Holly showed up on the news, and at least one executive was fired from the TV station that played the footage of Eddie attacking the rabbit. The KWK is still around, but their presence has diminished considerably, and thankfully they are much less newsworthy. _

_ Speaking of the KWK, the investigation by the mayor’s office didn’t turn up any wrongdoing on their part, though it did uncover a few mammals in both high and low places who have some really backward attitudes. _

_ Boris and his goons are going to be tried for murder, kidnapping, and several other crimes, including  _ _ criminal carnivorism, which we fortunately don’t see very often _ _. The badger was the first one to crack. They found his DNA on the gum that was stuck to the metal disk, and he folded not long after Boris was taken into custody. _

 

The naked trees in the hospital courtyard shivered in the cool breeze. Holly scurried about, as she crunched and burrowed through the piles of leaves that dotted the ground while Judy and Nick watched her from a nearby bench. 

Holly hopped over to Nick and jumped into his lap, staying long enough for him to ruffle her ears before she ran off to play in the leaves again.

He looked at Judy and tentatively asked, “How do you deal with it? The wolf, I mean?”

Judy shrugged. “I’ve had a few nightmares, but I’ve been able to rationalize his death pretty well. He was trying to take me away from you and Holly, and I just couldn’t let that happen.”

Nick put his arm on the bench behind Judy and she scooted closer to him.

They watched Holly playing for a few moments before Judy said, “By the way, you should thank Chief Bogo the next time you see him. I’m pretty sure he knew exactly what he was doing, when he told all of those officers to get out of my way. You know, the same officers who were blocking the view of half the crowd and most of the cameras.”

“I’ll make sure to send him a dozen roses to thank him for letting the world see my humiliation.”

“What, you mean a father holding his child, a bunny who obviously missed him? It may have felt humiliating to you, Nick. But to me, it was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

 

_ The psych team gave me a clean bill of health, and internal affairs finally cleared me to return to duty, so I’m headed back to work next week. I requested that Angie be temporarily transferred to our precinct, since I’ll need a partner until Nick comes back, and Chief Bogo seemed to like the idea. I’ll enjoy working with her again, but I’m really going to miss Nick at work. _

_ My parents surprised me when they came to visit for a few days. They said they’ve been worried about Nick ever since they saw him and Holly on TV. They visited with him in the hospital while they were here. It was nice watching them worry about someone else for a change. _

 

The hospital courtyard was covered in snow. Rita and Holly piled it into the shape of a mammal with long bunny ears and a big bushy tail while Nick and Judy watched them from their usual spot on a nearby bench.

Judy tilted her head. “What kind of snowmammal do you think that is?”

Nick squinted against the glare. “I think they’re making some kind of freaky fox-rabbit hybrid.”

Nick looked at Judy. “So, what do you and Little Carrots want for Christmas? I’m not sure I’m up to shopping this year, so my gift options are limited to whatever I can make out of popsicle sticks and the other odds and ends in the craft basket here at the hospital.”

Judy leaned against Nick, and he put his arm around her. “I just want you, Nick.” They watched Holly burrow in the snow for a few minutes before Judy looked up at Nick’s face and spoke again. “Have you thought about what we talked about? You know, writing things down?”

“I’m not like you. I never was one to write in a diary.”

“Not a diary, or a journal. Something… else. You were worried that everything that happened to you would come out in a trial. Honestly, I think it should come out. Everyone needs to hear the truth about what happened to you, Nick. Maybe an article for the newspaper? Or even a book.”

“A book? Are you kidding? And how would your little book end?”

“Your book, Nick. And how it ends is entirely up to you.”

 

_ He started with just a few pages, but before I knew it he was writing entire chapters. Eventually he’d written enough to give it a title:  _ **_How Two Little Carrots Saved My Life_ ** _. After I translated his scribbly handwriting and typed it into the computer, I eventually convinced him to let me show it to a publisher. _

_ The editor loved the story but hated the title. Apparently he was worried it would get misfiled in the healthy eating section or that only rabbits would read it or something. Nick, of course, insisted on keeping the title, and eventually he wore the editor down.  _

_ Once the publication schedule was set, I asked Nick who he thought should play him if his book ever got made into a movie. “Hairy Grant” was the name he finally came up with. I didn’t have the heart to tell him that Mr. Grant died of old age about two decades ago. Nick really needs to get out and see movies more often. _

_ Speaking of getting out, I’m worried that he’s becoming too comfortable in the hospital. He joked about being afraid to leave, since he was assaulted by a little bunny the last time he went out, but… I don’t know. I’ve avoided pressuring him. It’s hard, trying to decide how long I should let him recover there, and when I should start asking him to come home with us. _

 

It was a warm spring day in the hospital courtyard. The birds sang and green buds dotted the trees, one of which Holly walked around as she watched a caterpillar climbing on the bark.

Nick clasped his paws together and looked at the ground as he spoke. “I’m sorry I wasn’t there with you in court, Judy.”

“It’s ok. I decided to try a new tactic with Irvin. I just talked to him.”

Nick’s posture stiffened, and Judy tried to ignore his discomfort as she continued.

“Both our lawyers threw a fit, but I sat down with Irvin, just him and me, to try to work things out. Not surprisingly, it sounds like the KWK lawyers pressured him into taking me to court in the first place. In a way, it’s sad that he isn’t interested in Holly, aside from worrying that I’ll chase him down for support.”

Nick watched Holly intently as Judy paused for a few moments before continuing. 

“But I have to give Irvin credit, for admitting that even he realizes what a terrible dad he would be.”

Judy smiled as Nick relaxed and turned to look at her when she spoke again. “We’re still negotiating. It looks like the KWK is losing interest, and Jimmy thinks they may be about to ditch the case soon, now that the press has finally stopped reporting on it.”

Judy took a deep breath, before reaching out to grab Nick’s paw. “Which brings me to what I really wanted to discuss with you today. Holly and I have a question for you…“

 

***

 

_ I’m writing for the first time in the wonderful journal that Nick gave me for my last birthday. I’m excited, because exactly one week from today is what Nick likes to call our “famliversary”. It’ll be fifteen years since he officially adopted Holly, and ten since we got married. _

_ I’ve gained a bit of weight and look more like my mom than I did fifteen years ago. On the other paw, it's maddening how Nick has gotten more distinguished looking with age. He has more gray around his muzzle, and he wears glasses when he reads and writes. Even his handwriting looks better; it’s almost legible these days. _

_ He’s changed in other ways too. He enjoys the little everyday things more than he used to. He still has nightmares, but thankfully they’re rare. And he still likes to tease, but he’s also more openly supportive. Especially with Holly. He’s better about not hiding his emotions. I guess crying in front of thousands of strangers made him less afraid of that. _

 

Holly interrupted Judy as she wrote in her journal. “Mom, there’s some guy at the door… he says you need to sign for a package.”

Judy looked up at Holly and smiled. “Good morning, kiddo.” She was slightly taller than her mom, with red highlights in her hair and two spring hoop earrings in her left ear. Judy stood and kissed Holly on the cheek as she passed her on the way to the front door. “Have you seen your dad?”

Holly shrugged as she followed her mom. “Nope. He’s probably out in the shed. I haven’t seen him since I got up. Don’t forget, you promised to take me to my driver's license test before lunch.”

 

Judy carried a book as she made her way across the verdant backyard and through the overgrown trees to the shed.

She started to knock, but paused when she noticed a crudely drawn rabbit head inside a red circle with a slash through it hanging next to the door. She shook her head, then knocked as she spoke. “Nick, are you in there?”

When Nick opened the door, Judy scrunched up her face and pointed at the sign. “What, are you twelve years old?”

“Nope, I just don’t need any bunnies poking their cute little twitchy noses where they don’t belong while I work on a few things.”

Judy fidgeted excitedly, a wide grin on her face as she clutched the book to her chest. “Is it something for our anniversary next week?”

Nick smacked his forehead as he spoke dramatically. “Thanks for reminding me, Carrots. I totally forgot--”

Judy interrupted him. “Fine, smartass. No need for theatrics, if you don’t wanna tell me.” She bobbed up and down again with excitement as she gave the book to Nick. “Look what finally arrived today. I want you to have the first copy.” 

Nick took the book and asked, “Did you sign it for me?”

Judy stepped closer to him and rubbed his muzzle with her paw. “Nope, my dear fox, you’ll have to come to the signing next month and wait in line just like everyone else.”

Nick held the book and squinted as he read the title aloud. “ _ Our Story: Struggles of our Predator/Prey Relationship _ by Judy Hopps-Wilde.”

 

He looked at Judy and raised an eyebrow. “That’s the title you picked for the book describing our torrid love affair?”

“I wanted to call it,  _ Living with a Big, Dumb Jerk, _ but I didn’t have the patience to wear down my editor like you did.”

“And this picture on the front… ugh. You look beautiful as always, but why did you have to use a pic of me in my dress blues?”

“Aww, I love that picture of us. You look so handsome in your uniform. I hope you’ll finally read it, now that it’s published.”

Nick grinned slyly. “I dunno, I was there for all the good parts.” 

Judy hopped up and kissed him on the cheek as she looked at him mischievously. “You can say that again.”

Nick smiled as he hugged her. “Congrats, Carrots. I promise I’ll read it soon.”

Holly bounded across the yard to the shed. “Mom… we need to get going.”

Nick glanced over at Holly. “Well good morning Little Car--”

“Oh my god, Dad,” Holly rolled her eyes as she interrupted him. “Stop calling me that. Mom, please make him stop calling me that.”

“Don’t roll your eyes, dear, it only encourages him.”

Nick walked over and kissed Holly on the forehead, and she rolled her eyes again. “Good luck on the driver’s test today.” Nick smirked as he continued, “Try not to drive like your mom and you’ll do fine.”

He deftly dodged out of the way as Judy said, “Hey!” and tried to punch his arm.

Nick waved at the two rabbits as they walked back to the house. He took Judy’s book into the shed, and laid it on the small desk in the corner. He switched the desk lamp on and returned to work on the photo album on the desk.

It was open to the first page, which had  _ Our photo diary _ handwritten in large bold letters at the top, over a small black and white photo booth picture of Nick, Judy, and Holly.

He paged through the album, to look at the photos of his parents, Judy’s parents, and Rita. Next were photos of Judy holding Holly in the hospital, and Nick feeding Holly a bottle. Then there were others of Nick meeting Judy’s family at the bunnyshower after they got home from the hospital, and a picture of Nick flying Holly through the air, complete with a pink blanket cape dotted with orange carrots.

Nick paused for a long time on the page of pictures from the day he officially adopted Holly, as he held her on the steps of the courthouse. After that were photos of Nick marking Holly’s height on the doorway in the house, alongside his measurements from when he was growing up. And finally, two pictures of Nick and Judy cutting their wedding cake. In one, Judy looked annoyed as she fed a piece of cake to Nick while he “missed” her mouth and mashed cake on her face, followed by another picture of her laughing and pushing him away as he tried to lick her face clean.

Nick used scissors to cut out the cover from the dust jacket of Judy’s book. He glued it onto the next blank page of the photo album. Carefully he captioned it:  _ Soon to be Judy’s first million copy bestseller _ .

At the top of the next blank page, Nick carefully wrote:  _ I can’t wait for us to fill the rest of these pages together _ . He patiently let the ink dry before he turned back to the first page. He took a deep breath before he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small plastic bag and emptied it onto the table.

Two mangled carrot straight pins and a small metal disk glinted in the light from the desk lamp. He arranged and glued the pins under the photo before he picked up the disk. He stared at the word  _ Boris _ for several moments, before he applied a large glob of glue and stuck it to the page, heart side up.

Nick examined his handiwork and smiled. He yawned and stretched before he picked up Judy’s book and headed into the house.

He sat in his favorite stuffed chair in the living room as he removed the remnants of the book’s dust jacket and put on his reading glasses. Nick opened the book and read the dedication page.

  
_ To my husband Nick, whose selfish dream I want even more than he does. _


	13. Bonus Addendum

**Bonus Addendum**

 

If you enjoyed this story, you might take a quick detour and read the _Wilde Family Matters_ from my plotbunny collection, as that chapter takes place during the time skip in the last chapter of this story.

 

I just realized that tomorrow is Loving Day, so posting the last chapter feels even more special to me now.

 

I want to thank Nokusu and Kittah4 for the proofreading help, it made a huge difference in the final story. Please go read their awesome fanfics! Also a big thanks to all the other stories out there I’ve read, that kept my spirits up through the darkest points in my own story.

 

Thanks to everyone who stuck it out to the end. So many people stopped reading my first story after they were tricked by the Chapter 1 cliffhanger, so I’m thankful to everyone who trusted me enough to keep going (the one this story had at the end of Chapter 4 was so painful it even made me feel bad.)

 

I’m always amazed at my crazy google searches for these stories. One of my favorites this time around was “rabbit blood types”.

 

I originally wanted to call this story _Just Tell Me That You Love Me_ (inspired by listening to Fleetwood Mac’s _Tusk_ song way too much while I was writing) but decided it sounded too sappy, especially when I stumbled on the idea for the new title while trying to write a decent synopsis (I’m still trying, btw. I need to get better at synopsizing my stories. Also I just learned that synopsizing is actually a word.) Which reminds me of an alternate tongue-in-cheek synopsis I came up with:

 

“When someone shows up in Zootopia trying to find Nick’s dad, Nick and Judy go on a murderous rampage while trying to stop him.”

  
Also hat tips to _Better Caul Saul_ for Jimmy the Weasel’s name, and _Gattaca_ for Nick’s line about the Riviera.


End file.
